Beautifully Queer
by Griffen
Summary: She opened her eyes for the first time in the 16 years she had been alive, befriended an enstranged drag queen, and lived on her own accord. She never realized how hard life could be until she began to live it on her own. Dramione
1. Chapter One

**Authors Note: **Two Chapters in One! This is only going to be a 5 chappie story, no ladies and gents I am not slacking off; I just got this irresistible urge to write…this. I wrote a fiction press version to, so um yeah, if you wanna go there and check out Griffen…**Grave Yard Goth** is my story…I guess, I don't know how to explain, but yeah, this is me…in Hermione, it's a shocker and it's very special, I hope you guys like it…please read this and understand that Hermione is me, because in a way I'm Hermione, those of you who write would understand, when you write you always put a part of yourself into your character, I really hope you like it….****

**Please Enjoy**

****

****

****

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Harry Potter…kinda weird cause I don't have anything disturbing and slightly humorous things to say here…oh well…..MUNKEESSSS!!! MWHAHAHAHAHA!!! BIA'S!!!

****

****

****

****

**Death in a Dishwasher**

****

**(Chapter One, Part One)**

Eyes glazed over in nothing but shock, she walked towards the bloodied scene shaking from head to toe…

_They're dead…_

Her parents were there, at the table and in her mind she could still see their smiles greeting her to the dinner table, her mother had slaved away the whole day attempting to cook an acceptable meal for her only daughter's birthday. 

_Oh my god…_

Everything looked perfect, not one candle on her cake was blown out, a delicious pot pie still steamed, the delicious smell wafting over her delicate nose, in all of her silent hysteria Hermione sucked the welcoming smell in, sighing in apt satisfaction, nearly forgetting all the blood…

Her parents…were dead and there was blood all over…everything. She sat down at the table and stared in some sick fascination at the twin decapitated bodies, wondering what on earth had happened.

_Shouldn't I be sad? Crying? Ripping off my shirt and screaming 'Stella' at the top of my lungs of something?...Wonder where the heads are…_

Hogwarts star student stood up in absolute nonchalance and began to look for her parent's heads…

_Well, let's see…there's blood everywhere apart from the cake so this is some guy who's out to shock the living crap out of me, so if I was some sick fuck who wanted to terrorize a scared and estranged little school girl where would I hide her parents heads?_

She cried a triumphant 'hah!' and headed towards the kitchen…

_Miss.__ Granger comes through again…the dishwasher…what a sick bastard…_

There were her parent's heads in the dishwasher bloated beyond recognition and hardly a sight fit for a 16 year old girl. But never the less Hermione's renowned curiosity got the best of her and she picked her mothers head up, with a sad smile began to sing…

"Happy Birthday to me, Happy Birthday to me, Happy Birthday dear Hermione, Happy Birthday to…me"

There was nothing else she could do but pick up the phone and call the police, and whilst she was being drowned in the countless questions and flashing lights, Hermione Granger remained with a single question in her head…

_ Wonder if Dad got me that car like I wanted…_

You might view Hermione's actions as sadistic and demented, but you have to understand…it was what she was expecting. Being friends with Harry Potter is quite enough training for ones tolerance of death and gore, and her own personality mixed into this all…

She was simply tired.

Tired of the worry, and pressure that the world decided to feed her, and when it came her time to shine through and be happy for once, it decided to destroy it all with a dishwasher. So Miss. Granger had come to the conclusion whilst in Police Custody the night after her parents 'brutal murder' that she would not give this world or any other another chance to ruin her.

This was not going to affect her, her parents were dead so what? They weren't needed in the first place, in two years she would graduate and elevate (as her school records show) to the highest position the Wizarding World could offer…In a month or so she would be back in Hogwarts, back with those so-called friends of hers and all that bubbly emotions that dare invade her innards when with them…

The mere thought of granting the world a smile right now made her sick, and when coming back from the bathroom, she remembered something…

_There were markings….somewhere…when I picked up mum's head, there was something behind her ear, something with a…snake? _

She lost all control as logic set in…

_The dark mark. Oh my God, the dark mark…_

Her shock and fear was quickly replaced with anger, as she thought more on the revolting subject…

_But why? What have I done?_

**_What do you think you've done? Hmm? Does Harry ring a bell?_**

****

_But…I mean, Oh god. What would killing my family…have anything to do with it?_

**_Well, oh one with retarded IQ, they hurt you they hurt Harry, you're parents head wouldn't have been thrown in the dishwasher for a good wash if you hadn't have had that stupid little…ugh…I get sick even thinking it…crush on the "Boy Who Lived"….to fuck us all!_**

_No, Harry's my friend and he needed someone! I was only being human! I wouldn't have done this if I had known! _

**_Four simple words Granger, "Yes you would have" You have always been the weak one between us, and I must say im tired of your school girl stupidity, for gods sakes! YOUR PARENTS HEADS WERE IN THE DISHWASHER! BLOATED AND BLEEDING! And you still feel you have to protect that bastard…you are nothing but an idiot…_**

****

_No! This is not Harry's fault! None of this will ever be! It's not his fault he was born! And it certainly not his fault Voldemort is a sick man! _

**_Yes it is…if Harry hadn't "lived" all those years back  would you be in this position?_**

****

_No, I'd be dead!_

**_Not necessarily everything is not all up to Harry, you forgot Dumbledore!_**

****

_He would be dead to!_

**_Look little _****_Miss._****_ Know-It-All, the point is THAT IT'S NOT FAIR!_**

****

_It's not is it? But you can't blame that on anyone but Voldemort can you?_

**_Go look in the mirror Hermione…_**

****

She did as she was instructed and went to the mirror, almost crying at the sight she was greeted with. Her hair was tangled and dirty, her skin was pale and pasty, and there were lines all over her once fair face boasting of her physical defeat with the utmost unsightliness, her hands were worn and coarse, with hair matted to her sweaty face and an added unseemliness about her aura. Hermione Granger cried her heart out for all the wrong reasons…

**_I knew if I couldn't play the Harry killed your parents' card your self-esteem would work instead. You've always been a little bit shallow _****_Miss._****_ Granger…_**

****

_Shut up! I don't need this! I just need to sleep!!_

**_Don't give me that rest and relaxation crap Hermione! Why….isn't that what mother dear used to say? Before she was truncated? _**

****

She let out a strangled cry, throwing her self on the bed in a case of lost hope….

_Oh god!! Leave me be!!_

**_No! You need to realize Hermione! I am not backing down anymore! This sick fuck of a world doesn't need another puny and unsubstantial human being to breath in it's toxicated and superficial air totally cloaking themselves from any kind of pain at all…you hate yourself for being this way don't you? _**

****

_I don't know what you're talking about! Just shut up!_

**_For being the little girl in the corner who tries her best to ignore her mother being beaten with a burning iron by her own husband by burying her head in the nearest year 12 level book. I'm tired of the lies and so are you! _**

****

_They're really dead aren't they?_

**_And you need to do something about it!_**

****

_What could I do? After all I am only that little girl…_

**_STOP GIVING IN TO EVERYONE! FIGHT BACK FOR ONCE! For the sake of both of our sanities, just open your eyes! That's all I ask…_**

****

And with the words on her own troubled conscious to lead and guide her, Hermione Granger unlocked the little trunk of fear and secrets that she had kept in her heart since she was just a little girl, and breathed on her own account for the first time in her life…

**_There…now that wasn't so bad was it? _**

****

****

****

**Authors Note: **Don't worry I won't forget about Dear Diary, I just need to get this out of my system first! I didn't know if I could have kept my rationality if I didn't write this, I really hope you like it…please review..

**Thank You for Your Support…**

**Griffen**

****

****

****

****

****

****

****

****

****

**Authors Note: **You'd be surprised to find that this whole chapter as a one was written in the same night…I just want to get this over with and get back to Dear Diary, you know? So um, yeah this story should be finished in the next two weeks…I'll try my best to hurry up and get back to my originals, but please give this fic. Some of your time…thank you…I need a beta reader…

**Enjoy**

****

****

**Disclaimer:** I am in love with a Japanese artist called Miyavi and that is all you need to know (And no I don't own Harry Potter!)  

****

****

****

**Mannerly Masochism**

****

****

**(Chapter One, Part Two)**

She slept peacefully for the first time since her parent's demise and woke up feeling even better. 

_I guess that talk with my conscious did me some good…_

With a smile she made her way to the bathroom, the police had put her up in a hotel. Not knowing what else to do since she had no other family and no other friends, she was all alone…they just didn't know what to do with a seemingly orphaned genius…

**_I'm still here you know…_**

****

_Right…_

She got out of the rather comfortable bed and headed towards the luxury bathroom for the object of bathing…When in the bath Hermione pondered on what she should tell her "friends".

_I can't just show up at the burrow and say "Hey Harry, Ron, guess what? My parents were killed by Voldie lovers over the summer…it was fuuun"…_

**_Why not? _**

****

_Because! It's not…sane…_

**_What's your point?_**

****

_But…come on? Voldie lovers?_

**_Hey I have an idea! How bout you just NOT tell them! _**

****

_But they're my friends…_

**_No they're not _****_Miss._****_ Granger; they're just some guys you used to have crushes on…that's all._**

****

_…_

**_You know I'm right; I am your conscious after all! I know all little missy! Ditch those dorks!_**

****

_I've known them since 1st year. I can't they are my friends! I've been with them through EVERYTHING..._

**_Well looks like they missed something on the calendar, say that small little thing that happened about oh I don't know 4 days ago? _**

****

_That's different…_

**_How?_**

****

_It just is!_

**_Harry writes you non-stop, Ron even more! They write about EVERYTHING Granger, from their neighbor dying to the annoying booger stuck up their noses! And when something unbelievably important happens to you…you don't say a word!_**

****

_That's not true! I'm recovering I don't have to write them!_

**_Lady, you're crazy…I think you get less and less interested in your relationship with the Wonder Boys every year, getting tired of the same scene I see? _**

****

_No! I love those guys! They are my friends…_

**_That you're getting sick and tired off!  
  
_**

_You don't know anything! Harry's helped me through so much!! And he's alone! He NEEDS a friend like me!_

**_So it's a pity party?_**

****

_I didn't say that…_

**_Ahh! Granger slipped up! Where's that stunning IQ gone now?_**

****

_That's not what I meant…_

**_Yes it was, I'm gonna win this, because I speak the truth…you're just so fraudulent Hermione, you really disappoint me…_**

****

_You don't know what you're talking about!_

**_Ok, so it's pity for Harry, what about Ron? Maybe he's just there to boost your self-esteem, with the way he looks at you CONSTANTLY! Or maybe you feel sorry for his sister, you know? How she was seduced by the big bad and all…you're just as conceited as Pansy Parkinson, you know that? Just like every one else, NOTHING BUT A BIG FAT LIER!_**

****

The water had run cold now, and when she got out of the bath tub, she was assaulted with an onslaught of goose bumps.  She quickly wrapped a soft, cotton towel around her young body, and for the first time since her little 'session' she looked in the mirror.

She was back to normal, looking like a typical teenage girl was just so fit for her, she didn't know if she could handle the change…She wasn't beautiful or even pretty, she was just plain old Hermione, she sometimes wondered why Ron liked her so much…It had been no secret to her of course, ever since the Viktor Krum incident she had known, and was only flattered by the new piece of information, nothing more, nothing less…She had shamefully flirted to keep the flame alive, just to suit her own purposes. Totally brushing him off when he hinted on a date or something. She just wanted him there for show, to prove to the world, that she was not the lonely ditz everyone thought her to be…

And in that sense she really was selfish…

**_I told you so…you're not as perfect as you think Hermione Granger…_**

****

She brushed her long and bushy mane in silence, guilt creeping into her knowledgeable filling. 

**_Why are you so afraid of change Granger? Don't you want to live at all? Or would you rather live your parent's life, dismal, dull, and dead? _**

****

She dried herself of quickly, then put on some clothes, a simple tank top and baggy jeans. Hermione was never one to show off…not in public anyway…

**_There you go again, scared to take any chances what-so-ever…you might as well be Snape, live your life as the most hated teacher in Hogwarts with a bad nose job…_**

****

She locked her hotel room door, and preceded down the lobby a small knapsack over her shoulder and about 50 quid in her pocket. The Elevator opened with a ringing chime and she complied with it's invite by stepping in. With a simple press of a button she was in the Hotel Lobby and not asking for any directions, she set herself off and alone in the middle of London no clue what so ever of where she was and how she got there…

**_I wonder where the little bookworm is off to now…_**

****

Her first stop was to find a phone, and she let out a small smile when she saw a diminutive and totally obscure pub not ten feet away from her… she made her way inside nearly choking on the intake of smoke she had to inhale…a few men smiled at her but she shrugged them off in disgust and went straight up to the bartender…

"No service"

He was a young man, only hitting his 20's, handsome to be sure, but much too cocky for her…

**_There you go again, with the "Oh my! Everyone seems to looking down my shirt!" stance. I would really appreciate if you just drop the role of the egotistical little fuck for once, you know?_**

****

"I only want to use the phone"

He smiled, look relived and wiped his brow with the dirty dish rag he had used to wipe the counter, leaving a slight smudge of dirt on his otherwise clean forehead; she couldn't help but giggle as he led her through the back. And with deft instructions something about no long distance or something like that. He left Hermione alone, with nothing but the voice in her head, a phone number and no courage at all…

**_If you want to prove to me that they really your TRUE friends call them…it's as simple as that!_**

****

She picked up the telephone with conviction, and dialed the number, it rang only three times and she was just about to hang up when:

"Hello, this is the Dursley residence; may I ask who is calling?"

Aunt Petunia she guessed, the lady sounded like a downright witch even on the phone…she put up her best front and replied…

"Oh yes, this is Hermione Granger, may I please speak to Harry?"

She could HEAR Mrs. Dursley turn pale over the phone, he voice cracked at bit when she called out Harry's name and with a sickly and disappointed voice she said…

"Yes, he is on his way"

And left…Harry was on not soon after, and the sound of his voice made her feel even guiltier then she did before, she was silent for a moment not knowing what to say…

**_Well come on! What are you waiting for?_**

****

"Harry? It's me…Hermione"

"Oh! Hermione! How are you? We haven't heard from you all summer…what's been going on over there?"

He sounded so cheerful, that she wanted to cry… he had been so good  to her for the past 5 years and had saved her life countless times, and this is how she repays him, with false promises of friendship and selfish motives? 

"Everything's fine over here, I was just checking up on you…Dad took me to….Germany for the summer, I'm in London now"

**_Lies sure do come easily for you, well of course they would. After all you've been lying to these to rejects since the beginning of… well….TIME._**

****

"Sounds fun, I guess your owl refused to make a trip that far huh?"

"Yes, and also the tiny fact that dad wouldn't let me bring it along…"

He laughed, and it felt good to hear someone laugh, it made her smile…

"Harry? I have to go soon, my dads expecting me down for…breakfast, I'll see you on the train…"

He sighed and said…

"Alright 'Mione, Ron and I really do miss you…"

"I miss you all too"

"Please try and write us…"

"Everyday…"

"Well…see ya 'Mione"

"Goodbye Harry"

**_Well that was a bloody waste of time…_**

****

 She left the pub, not before thanking the bartender whose name she later found out was James. He gave her a flirtatious smile which she returned with a knowing eye roll…

She didn't have a clue where she would go next, her last obstacle had been tackled with absolutely no vigor at all, and she really didn't think she was up to anything…

She opted to go back to the hotel and sleep the rest of her life away, when someone caught her eye…

A woman, or someone she hoped was a woman stood in the street across from her, looking out into space with nothing much to do…but it wasn't the person who intrigued her it was the clothes…She was wearing a dress, something along the lines of "Little Bo Peep" but much tighter and smaller, it was black with random decorative ribbons flailed all over the place. The women's hair was done in a pig tails, styled to perfection as they fell in smooth ringlets past her shoulders, they were jet black also drowned in ribbons extraordinaire…her boots were… something else, and gave Hermione a stunning picture of what might be this ladies nighttime profession might be. Everything was black about this mystery woman, and Hermione thought it beautiful…

She couldn't help herself; she crossed the street in a trance not even minding the people who bumped into her, not until she had talked to the lady…

"Hello"

The woman looked up in surprise than smiled, her black lipstick contrasting deeply to the shining white teeth…

"I'm sorry, I just couldn't help myself, and I think your outfits beautiful…"

What came out of the fascinating "woman" would haunt little Hermione for the rest of her life…

In a totally masculine voice, the "woman" crossed her legs, smiled and said…

"Doll, if you're a dike looking for some gay lovings, sorry to say, but I swing the other way…"

Hermione was silent and just stared at the person who had just had a magical sex change right in front of her eyes.

"Yes darling, I'm a man, and if it's the clothes you're interested in, there's a little store down the road from here, I could show the way if you like?"

She didn't know where this apparent man was taking her; she just couldn't get of the fact that this beautiful woman was not so womanly…

"Sweetling, I'd appreciate much if ya shut ya trap"

She complied immediately, partly from fear…

"Ta"

Nothing about this strange person gave signs of homosexuality; Hermione couldn't help but say;

"You really are beautiful women you know?"

Partly idiocy, part curiosity, was the cause of this statement, and she was very happy with herself for the having the balls (no pun intended) to speak up…

"Why, thank you…"

He peered down at her from the elevating height that his platforms escalated him too and continued…

"And you make quite a catch also"

She nodded and said…

"Yes, but I am actually in compliance with my sex"

"And your point is?"

They laughed quietly for a moment, then silence followed after, it took most of Hermione's concentration to follow the strange man through all the twists and turns he was taking…

"What's you name?"

She gazed up at him with a wide eyed innocence that made the outlandish man laugh…

"Thorn"

"Pretty name"

"You?"

"Hermione"

He scrunched up his delicate nose in disgust and said…

"Hate it already, might as well change it. I'm sensing friendly vibes from you little girl. I was having quite a bad day and the compliment on my outfit was well placed, I do believe we are going to be the best of friends, so…what should your new name be?"

He stopped and stared at her for a moment, which made Hermione tremendously uncomfortable…; being stared down by a drag queen would not be expected to be anything but uncomfortable…Finally he said something…

"Your eyes, honey sort off…between Linn honey or Cleome honey, so what we'll it be? Linn or Cleome?"

She looked at the man skeptically wondering if Little Bo Beep had gone of his/her rocker, she sighed in defeat, wondering if she was ever going to get to this so called "store".

"Linn, I guess"

"I knew it! You seem quite the intellectual Linn, I like you already! Ahah! There it is!"

If it really was a shop, where people actually went to go and shop and by things that cost money, it was one of the strangest Hermione had ever seen! They were in a dark alley, with nothing but homeless bums and hungry rats to keep them company, a dingy and dirty door greeted them not at all welcoming…she could help but feel she had fallen in and Al Pacino Movie, right at the part where the snitch is about to get shot…

Thorn knocked on the door twice, and its loud and metal drum was loud enough for anyone to hear…

"Ronny? Come on! Open up you sick bastard! It's me"

It opened in a hurry, Thorn grabbed Hermione's hand and pulled him in with her, and needless to say she was quite amazed…it was a complete opposite of where she had been dolefully standing just a second ago, everything looked so…rich…

Ronny was a girl about her age, cropped bleach white hair and blue thick eyeliner, Hermione thought her just as beautiful as her Sapphic predecessor…

The store had obviously gone for a Japanese look, with beautiful wall coverings and exquisite fur lined EVRYTHING, all over…It really was fascinating. Especially to clean in the clear Hermione. 

"Linn, darling come over here, and talk to Ronny"

Thorn acted as if they were long lost friends, she didn't know what to do but smile… it seemed Ronny understood her predicament, she could tell by the comforting and embarrassed look on her face…

"Ronny, sweetie this is Linn, Linn with a double N!  Not a boring old Lin"

He stretched it out into an annoying whine causing both 'Linn' and Ronny to wince…

"Those are just to boring! It's L-I-N-N! She's your new project!"

The words 'she's your new project' did nothing but terrify Hermione as her thoughts raced through the millions of things that word could mean, she did blindly follow a drag queen that she'd never met before and after all she had heard so many stories from her parents about crazy fags that like to steal women's genitals… The words project was not really comforting, but as he rambled on she began to understand the meaning of his words…

"I found her in the middle of the street totally alone and oh so bland! Couldn't take it! So we've adopted her as our own and are going to transform her into one of us, you know the drill lock her in the basement until she's as pale as Michael Jackson's arse, then adorn her with cosmic and beautiful material things! Understand Ronny? You must do your best on this one! She complimented my outfit! Not like your last!"

He rolled his eyes upward, whilst Ronny lit a fag, but continued not before mumbling something about cancer…

"God what a retard, did she have a penis Ronny?"

She nodded, and looked as though she had tuned out the rambling cross dresser, doing her own little roll eyes to the ceiling maneuver as she turned her attention elsewhere…

"Did you fuck her?"

Another nod, and by now Hermione was blushing as much as a Weasley…Thorn noticed this and said…

"D-A-R-L-I-N-G! If you're going to be with me! You must drop the blushing little school girl act! It really doesn't become you!"

  
She nodded fervently the blush still invading her otherwise pale face…Thorn frowned at her in dismay but continued on with his speech anyway…

"Listen Ronny, I want her to be all B-L-A-C-K! None of that Neo Goth thing you pull off so…so…W-I-E-R-D-L-Y! Just simple and elegant beauty, otherwise…"

Ronny perked up with the otherwise and dropped her cigarette very unceremoniously.

"Otherwise?"

"I tell Hermione about the little diddy in the cavern"

It was her turn to blush now, Ronny stuttered out a shaken 'You wouldn't' and Thorn just smiled with a 'Try Me'.

She had no clue what was going on and she didn't think she really needed to know about the little diddy in the cavern, it all sounded very homosexual to her, so instead she tuned them out and stared to explore the store. Hoping Thorn wouldn't notice her absence, all went well as Thorn tried his best to swindle whatever he was trying to swindle out of Ronny.

"Oh yes I will!"

"No you won't you dumb FAIRY FUCK!"

"Oh! You wanna talk dirty now do ya?"

"Listen here little Miss "Scared to look in the mirror naked because I don't wanna see my M-A-N-L-I-H-O-O-D! You won't say jack shit about the stupid retarded and over all G-A-Y diddy in that fucked up cavern because that wasn't me that was YOU! One with IQ of a retarded CHIUAUA!"

"Was that me? Oh I do believe it was….hmm….what about that Hawaiian girl?"

"MY SISTER!"

"You fucked your sister?"

Thorn blinked rapidly at the angry lesbian, a perfect picture of mute innocence…Hermione just stared at the homosexuals in adamant amusement…she was way past the shock level now…

"No I didn't fuck my sister…YOU DID!"

"She was the flat blow job?"

Ronny rolled her eyes and stormed angrily out of the store….Thorn turned around and said with a faint smile…

"And here I thought I was gay…"

Hermione laughed along with him, and couldn't help but smile at her new friend's antics. 

"Now we have to get you some EXCEPTABLE clothes…those are just so freaking NORMAL!"

He disappeared behind a random door, asking arbitrary questions…

"How old are you Sweetling?"

"16 about 4 days ago"

"Really? What did you do for your b-day?"

"Nothing really, my parents took me out and stuff, the usual…"

She felt comfortable lying about that day, and was a little bit guilty that it was to her new friend…

"What's you bra size?"

She was startled out of her deep though and answered rather timidly…

"Don't know"

"Here I'll measure…"

He came out of wherever he had gone with a measuring tape and a strange glint in his eyes…

"36C"

He announced proudly, and then disappeared again…she stood alone with a faint blush on her cheeks with the thought 'I just got felt up by a fag' rotating in her learned mind…

"Found the perfect thing!"

He came back out with a dress in his arms, handing it to her with a small and knowing smile on his face…

"Before you put that on, I want to do you hair…"

He directed the poor, confused girl to a chair, taking a brush out of nowhere he pulled her hair out of the tight and restricted bun, and began to brush…

"Darling…your hairs so…rough…you know, a persons hair says a lot…"

Hermione smiled and said…

"Oh really?"

"Uh-huh. Yours is so damaged, there's something wrong in your life, and something's happened that you don't want to share…I can understand that…but you really should take better care of it…"

She just uh-huhed back, slightly disheartened.

"Black…is it ok if I dye it black?"

She didn't know what to say, and just stared at a random lock on her forehead, wondering what her parents would think if she came home with hair like Thorn's…

**_They're dead Granger, you don't have to worry about them any more…_**

She nodded, still unsure about her decision, and without a word she closed her eyes although she was still a bit doubtful, but she trusted Thorn automatically...

About two hours later she woke up to find Ronny's smiling face peering down at her from his seat on the couch beside her…

"He knocked you out!"

She claimed with glee, practically jumping up and down like a little school girl.

"Where's Thorn?"

Hermione asked groggily with a distinct feeling of something amiss…she rubbed the sleep out of her eyes and sat up, vision still blurry…

"Out"

Ronny replied simply getting up from her comfortable seating…

"You really do look great Linn"

She had almost forgotten the endearing nickname Thorn had appointed her with and smiled when Ronny said it…

"What do you mean?"

"You will pose for "Pyrrhic Pixie" right?"

They said at the same time, then laughed and Ronny continued…

"Look in the mirror…"

She directed Hermione to the mirror that hung on top of the wall beside the counter; she quickly made her way to it, not recognizing her reflection at all…

"Wow" 

Was all she could say, her hair was long and soft…looking even better then it did at her last ball…it fell gracefully down to the small of her back in small black ringlets, contrasting to her noticeably pale skin magnificently. 

The dress Thorn had brought out she wore with pride, and she faintly wondered if he had gotten a few misplaced giggles out of putting it on her…

It was a corset-dress, black, as Thorn had requested with a short skirt supported with at least twelve layers of chiffon, around the hemline were six large black faux leather crosses. Her make-up was done extraordinarily and though Hermione had promised herself that she would never fall into the media's cauldron of make-up junkies she had to admit she looked excellent…black lipstick, eye shadow, everything! 

"Wow"

"You only met Thorn 3hrs ago right?"

She nodded mutely still staring at her reflection…

"He must really like you…hey listen! Well Thorn heard you mumble something about a hotel when you were being all done up, and…um…I was wondering since you're only a teenager, and doesn't look like you have many places to go, and of course you might run out of money, and since the stuff Thorn used, kinda costs A LOT, I was wondering if you could you know, work?...here?"

She smiled for the fourth time that day, feeling a tad lightheaded, she nodded fervently until Ronny got the message. With a big smile on her face and a new makeover, Hermione stared her first job ever…as a sales clerk …

Ronny hadn't made it clear what she wanted Hermione to do but left her alone in the store anyway, claming she was going to go and find her faggy friend…

She busied herself behind the cash register, sorting out random papers trying to keep her hands occupied, when her famous conscious decided to drop by for a visit…

**_Brilliant Granger…absolutely fabulous!_**

****

_What?_

**_You took the plunge! You weren't afraid!_**

****

_You're saying this because I got a make-over?_

**_Yep! Because this isn't an ordinary make-over, this is a new life!_**

****

_I just dyed my hair…_

**_No, you dyed your L-I-F-E, you've changed, and I'm proud, you're not gonna go back to the hotel as a little teenage ditz! You're  a different person now, I mean look at you!_**

 And she did, stealing another glance in the mirror, a small happy smile on her pallid face…

**_You're Linn…_**

****

_I'm Linn…and Thorns a fag…_

**_Nice observation…._**

****

_But what happens when I go back to school? _

**_Do you want to?_**

****

_Well of course! I still have my life to live! I need an education for that…_

**_I guess, but wouldn't it be more fun to hang out with a pair of homosexuals and make fun of all the normal people?_**

****

_I need school, its part of my life, and beside there's still Harry and Ron!_

**_Right, those fucks…_**

****

_I need school, even if I won't use my education when I get older, I need the experience…_

**_Customer…_**

****

The entrance bell chimed accordingly, and Linn looked up to the new visitor with a smile…

"Welcome to Pyrrhic Pixie. How may I help you?"

She said, as if she had been doing it all of her life…

It was a young man, around 19. He smiled brightly at her, and she didn't notice she was to busy staring at his hair…never in her life had she met stranger people…

"You're a newbie I see, where's the fag?"

It was piled on his head jutting out in random colorful spikes, reminding her of an anime character. An idle thought came to her about how much gel this man must waste…but she still smiled and replied…

"Out. But I can help you"

He flashed a dirty smile and replied…

"I bet you can"

Without even a blink she retorted with…

"Go fuck yourself with a prickled penis"

"Ooo! Feisty!"

He leaned on the counter and began to play with a random curl of her hair, that smile still painted on his face…

"What's your name?"

"Linn"

"Linn? Pretty…like its owner"

She just rolled her eyes, and moved her head away from his grasp…not knowing who was fueling her courage she stood in front of him with no fear at all…

"Are you going to buy something or not?" 

"No I'm here to get my hair done"

"Why? Looks fine to me"

He laughed and said…

"It may look tremendously cool, like my hair always will, but sadly its not really supposed to look like this…"

"Oh really?"

She moved out from behind the safety of the cash register, and stood in front of him scrutinizing his hair. Well aware of the knowing smile that seemed to be itched into his features…

She prodded it unceramoniuosly, and smirked…

"What happened to it?"

"Little sister…"

"You look like an idiot…"

"Thank you?"

"What's your name?"

He smiled again at this…

"I'm Thorns little brother…Trey"

"You're related to Thorn?"

Now that she thought about it this stranger did have a slight resemblance to the he/she, his eyes were the most distinct though, the same crystal blue as Thorns…

"Unfortunately"

"But oh dearest brother, who would do your hair if you didn't have me?"

Thorn made his grand appearance, smiling his ass off at the two youngings…Ronny stood behind him glaring at Trey like he was vermin, Linn immediately sensed confrontation…

"Hi fuck-tard"

"Hi raging lesbo!"

They shot at each other, Thorn just laughed at bit nervously taking his coat off he embraced Hermione as if she was his only daughter lost at birth…

"They make such a cute couple"

He whispered in her ear…

"Too bad she IS a raging lesbo!"

He let go of and smiled, then turned to his 'brother' with a frown and said…

"What happened to your head?"

"Your brat sister attacked me with glue while I was asleep"

"Not my fault you ARE a fuck-tard!"

"Well if I am! I must have got it from you!" 

"Shut up, Evita-lover!"

"You're the one that cried!"

"Well I'm a fag! I'm allowed to! Mr. I'm as straight as my hard on!"

"Just fix my hair!"

"Sit!"

She never would understand Thorn and Treys relationship, she was just happy she wasn't in the cross-fire…her sub-conscious was right. She had changed, nothing was or would be the same. Her parents were dead, and she had no one left to depend on but these two queers, and she wasn't sure she was comfortable in the hands of Thorn. He was just to pretty to be trusted…and Ronny, was just Ronny and reminded her allot of Ron, which only made her feel guilty…

She didn't know what to do with her new look, or her new attitude. She was still only 16…but then again she had her whole life ahead of her, and there was still school and Harry…Dumbledore would be looking for her as soon as he found out about the Death Eater's visit to her house, and she would be forced to spend the rest of her days in Hogwarts, which didn't sound at all entertaining…

**_Better suck up the fun while it lasts…_**

****

****

****

****

****

**Authors Note:** Do you like it? I don't know what to do with all the info. in my brain right now…I really do need a beta reader….

**Thank you**

**Griffen**

****


	2. Chapter Two

**Authors Note:**__Thank you for your reviews…I'm glad you guys like this story…I'll try my best not to follow the cliché "Hermione Get's A Make-Over And Draco Falls Head Over Heals Then They Ride Off Into The Sunset Together And Have Beautiful Babies" deal, I understand how much that story line has been over used and I am quite tired of it myself…Thorn and Ronny, are portrayers of characters in my own life and I want to dedicate this story to all of my friends, especially Grey, my personal estranged drag-queen…::shakes head and sighs:: me and my strange life…I hope you like the second chapter…

**Enjoy**

****

****

****

****

**Disclaimer: **I don't own anything, but a little box of my sanity stashed in a corner with leather rope and a cat suit ready…Hehehe.

****

****

****

****

****

****

**Splintered Sagacity**

****

****

****

****

****

Sleep was what she needed now. She never knew entertaining a bored drag-queen could be so tiresome…at last at 2 am in the morning; Thorn had dropped her off at the hotel with a frown on his face, saying…

"You could just sleep over you know"

But that was just a little too much for "Linn"; she would've been too frightened to sleep with Thorn in the same room. It was childish really, how she was afraid of that man, he was as gentle as a mouse, she knew that. But it didn't stop her from being intimidated…it was his whole presence, his demeanor, his total nonchalance for the world around him that terrified her…it made her wonder if she could ever live a life as promiscuously as Thorn did…with a small sigh and slight shake of her head she lay down on the soft hotel bed, cherishing the feel of its smooth cotton sheets against her worn body…

He really was an interesting fellow, with the cosmos seemingly at his fingertips and no care for the future, he lived as though every minute was his last…he truly was beautiful…some day she wished she could be as gorgeous as Thorn, or even Ronny! But when she looked at herself now, all she saw was a bland and boring normal little girl…

**_But the hair changes a lot about that perception…_**

Yes that hair, the one thing that she could now rightly say she was proud of.  All thanks to Thorns, it seemed that anything he touched turned into a masterpiece and one day soon she hoped 'Linn' would be included in that collection…

The dress that Thorn had given her lay on the chair adjacent to her, she stole a quick glance at it again, wondering how on earth she had in her right mind worn that in public…

**_Trey said you were pretty in it…_**

****

Trey…he was another story. 

His hair was black straight and longer than her own, which irked her immensely no man should have longer hair then herself…and the fact that it was much prettier then her own was just to much, she had seen the before and after effects of his tresses and marveled at how stunningly sexy he was…but there was nothing there. 

And even if she wanted there to be, he was much to perfect for little 'ol Hermione…tall, graceful and much like his elder brother…something she could never attain and didn't even want to go through the embarrassment of trying…the only person she could have ever interested was Ron, and that situation spoke for itself…

She didn't even want to think of school right now, and she even admitted to herself that she wasn't prepared for it at all! She wasn't really sure she could ever be…

**_Maybe Linn can go in your place…_**

All she needed was rest now…until tomorrow, she would just have to worry about things later…

"GET UP!"

"Thorn leave her alone, you made her stay up to late! I swear you can be so selfish sometimes! Let's just go back to the store! She'll come on her own account! When she's actually AWAKE!"

Two familiar voices woke up the still immensely sleepy Hermione from her most needed slumber, and without a word to her two intruders she got up and out of bed and headed straight towards the bathroom not even looking to see who had invaded her personal bubble…

"LINN! You're up!"

She had prayed, hoped against all odds that the front desk would have not given her room number to Thorn, but she knew that he would have been able to scare or flirt his way into it somehow, gay men or not...

"I really am sorry Linn; he just wouldn't shut up until we got here"

Hermione made no sign that she even realized they were there and began to brush her sparkling white teeth, being the only child of two dentists always paid off…

"Linn! Ohh! We're going shopping!! Isn't that exciting?"

She continued to brush with vigor, completely ignoring the two trespassers…

"Linn?"

Thorn looked a bit disheartened, and then quickly got angry at the young girls total ignorance of his presence…his ego worked into it all, producing a tremendous hissy fit…

"LINN! HELLO!! THORN LOVER OF THE GODS IS IN YOUR PRESENCE BOW DOWN TO MY ALL SEXY-NESS!! NOW!!"

She returned to look at him eyebrow raised and toothbrush not so gracefully shoved in her mouth…with a jaw full of toothpaste she said…

"What?"

Totally innocent and actually looking the part! She bothered Thorn even more, Ronny just shook her head and turned her attention elsewhere, now used to Thorns renowned bitchy sessions and deciding to stay out of it, as she quietly snuck out into the hallway…

"What? What? I'm visiting you! YOU SHOULD BE SO FREAKING HAPPY! SMILING AND BOWING DOWN TO HIS GRACOUIS MAJESTY THORN LOVER OF THE MASSES!"

"You're kidding right?"

He blinked a few times, face ruby red from all the shouting and stared at her silently, then stood up straight, flipped his hair and replied…

"Yep"

She nodded, pushed him out and slammed the door behind him…

"Well someone's a right bitch today"

Ronny came back with a smirk on her face eyes glued to Thorns clothes, he looked down to where she was staring and nearly panicked….

"What? Oh my god! Is there something on me? Is my outfit ruined? Was it on the worst dressed list? WHAT?"

She laughed as hard as she could at her friend's antics and shook her head wiping a stray tear from her face…

"You look like a man"

"Is that it?"

"You're not dressed like a girl"

****

"So?"

"…You actual LOOK like a man!"

"Am I missing something?"

"You're YOU! The gayest man alive! You don't even own a pair of pants!"

"Oh right! These are Treys! I was just looking for a peaceful day of shopping, no riots, no 'hi fairy fuck', just wanna take Linn out of this place…everything's so bland here"

She smiled at him and said…

"So nice that you care"

"Well some of us have hearts!"

"Are you insinuating something…FAIRY FUCK?"

"No, you two-timing freak of nature! Whose sister gives a flat blow job!"

She would've been at his neck if she hadn't noticed Hermione standing on the threshold of the bathroom door. Thorn noticed her distraction to and immediately frowned. Once again the topic of conversation was back on clothes…

"No! You are not to be seen in public with me, with that…that….that…FILTH on!"

He threw his knapsack into her hands, and without a word she disappeared back into the bathroom…

"So much to learn"

Thorn sighed and collapsed into the nearest able and willing seat  he could find…the floor. Ronny peered down at him resisting the urge to laugh, he looked like such a 7 year old plopped down on the floor like that…

His formerly curled black hair, was now pin straight and in a messy ponytail with random strands flailing about, impairing his already not so 20/20 eyesight, one sleeveless black muscle shirt which showed off what Ronny thought Thorn was never capable of attaining…muscles, and a pair of rather normal and overly baggy black pants, sitting cross-legged on the floor trying desperately to blow a piece of hair of off his nose… 

****

"What?"

He asked, looking totally faultless…She was about to retort with some snide and mean comment, but instead sat right down beside him and laughed, he gave her the strangest look possible, rolled his eyes and looked away…

"Lesbians"

She punched him in the arm with that comment and he feigned a cry of pain and looked offended…

"Don't take out your sexual frustration on me!"

"Will you just shut up!?!? What did you have in that bag? Not another freebie from my shop?"

She sounded exasperated, and looked slightly annoyed; he looked away quickly looking out of the window with a mask of interest on his face…

"Look at the pretty butterfly!"

"THORN!!"

"Well she's gonna be working there, so I figured she could just pay it off…"

"Thorn, come on! You're being way too generous!"

"Look! She is a perfectly sane and intellectual girl! I mean her names Hermione for god's sake! Doesn't that sound like a bibliophilic name to you! She goes to school and has nothing better to occupy her time but those god forsaken books! (Im just guessing here!) She NEEDS these little gifts from me!" 

"Whatever Thorn….im going for a smoke"

She proceeded to get up causing a rather child like whine to come form Thorn…

"You're not mad are you?"

"'Coarse I am"

And with that she left…Thorn huffed and puffed, even dared to hold his breathe hoping that his life long friend would "sense" his bitchy brattiness and come to the rescue…but alas Ronny was just to pissed of for her own good…

"Smokers…what assholes!!"

He got up and began to preoccupy his time, peering around the hotel room in bored curiosity…he noticed a random open suitcase in the corner, and the designer in him couldn't help himself…

"What the hell is this?"

There was nothing but cotton pullovers and "suitable" underwear to fill the tweed compartment…he stared at the bathroom door in amazement…

"Maybe I am right…maybe…no it couldn't be….Linn's a…bookworm…which means….SHE'S A VIRGEN!!!"

He squealed like a little fan girl, and bolted for the bathroom nearly breaking of the lock in his attempts to barge in…

"Oh my god!"

Hermione was far past alarmed and held on to her heart for good measure…

"What? What's happening?"

He giggled madly scaring 'Linn' even more…

"You're a…a…"

He clutched his side helplessly, snickering his butt off…

"A what?"

"VIRGEN!!...I've never met one before!!"

She blushed again like a Weasley, stuttering out a…

"W-what of it?"

"Oh my god! I'm so gonna get you laid!!"

"GET OUT!!"

"No! No! Wait!"

"What?"

"Have you ever seen a porno?"

"GO AWAY!"

"Cruel Intentions?"

"JUST SHUT UP!!"

"Ever been fingered?"

"OH MY GOD!"

"Ok I'll stop!"

"Now go away!"

"Nope! I wanna see the outfit on you!"

She'd nearly forgotten to be appalled at the clothes she was clearly flaunting…she had made this big speech about decency and the mind set of virgins, she would've have even gone as far as locking herself in the closet to get away from the embarrassment…

"There's nothing to be embarrassed about…I think you look…downright sexy!"

"That's the problem!"

It was a simple black halter with a bleached out skull splattered on the front. She knew immediately this was Ronny's design. Thorn was much too elegant; he couldn't even think about something like this without having an epileptic fit! She only knew this because of his continues banter slandering neo-Goths and their weird hair…She was just too impressionable around them for her own liking!

Black, baggy pants, Thorn referred to them as "Bondage Pants", but she didn't even want her mind going there… they were to baggy and hung of her wide hips showing off her sharp hip bones…He surveyed her, brow furrowed as if in deep thought.

"Turn around" 

Was his simple command, and she complied silently…

"Jewelry is needed"

He grabbed his knapsack and looked through it as if in a hurry.

"There you are you little Nazi's! These would look fabulous on you!"

Dangling handcuff earrings, and a spiked choker. She was completely appalled…Never in her life had she seen something so suggestive before! The bookworm in her practically screamed…

"But!"

"Shut up and look fab!"

But Thorn struck much more fear in her, so she silently put on the provocative items, and frowned her ass off until Thorn frowned back!

"Live a little!"

Were his simple words. And dragging her out into the public eye he added…

"You're spokeswomen for Pyrrhic Pixie! BE PROUD!"

"I don't wanna!"

She wined her way towards Ronny, who gave her a slight smirk, clearly pissed off and strutted down the street. She looked to Thorn for and explanation, he just shrugged and sad.

"Its that time of the month"

**Authors Note:** I decided to end it right here, I was procrastinating too much for my own good…I hope you like this! I'm watching Oliver Twist, the one with Elijah Wood…mmm…Elijah, you can blame him for my procrastination! 

**::giggles::**

**Griffen**

****

****


	3. Chapter Three

**Authors Note:** Hello! I'm doing the update thing in periods! You see my computer died and decided to be a whore and not fix it self…no matter how many times I tried to apologize to it for all the downloading…but alas. IT DECIDED NOT TO LISTEN! And so it committed suicide with a phone cord and a pair of scissors after trying to castrate itself…'cause it's a whore like that. But I got a new one…and this one is much more agreeable. It actually works and that is very happy. New Chapter of **Dear Diary **should be out next week if not…it just won't, sorry I'm a born procrastinator. Please enjoy and review. Love you all and hope you like this chapter.

Oh! And P.S. Have any of you noticed how most of the HP fanfics that just happens to be Dramiones are all about her getting raped over the summer? COME ON! SUBMIT SOME ORIGINALATY!

**Enjoy**

****

****

**Disclaimer:** I don't know anything…be happy I don't own your checkbook…pssh…that one sucked…even if I did put in an evil giggle right there it still wouldn't be right.  What's wrong with me?

****

****

**Hypochondria in a Bottle**

****

****

****

Two weeks and that was all. It had been at least a month since the death of her parents and that faithful encounter with a colorful queen named Thorn. Hermione, otherwise known as Linn, had been living in complete and utter pacification since it all. And was adoring every second of it.

Custody had been reverted to her Aunt in America, a young woman of only 24, who was by no means ready to raise an orphaned 16 year old, so when Hermione opted to stay in England with her  "friends" there was no argument. 

**_Not sure if you wanna go back huh?_**

****

**Of course not!  I'd rather stay here any day! But I suppose I must…**

Too deep in her thought to pay attention to anything around her, Hermione did not notice the front doors opening to the formidable figure that now stood in front of her. She continued to rearrange the merchandise in Pyrrhic Pixie without regard for the foreign character that was presently behind her.

**_You have to! I mean there's Harry and Ginny. Oh! And don't forget Ron! That luscious lover boy of yours._**

****

**That's not even a topic to joke about…**

"Excuse me?"

She was startled out of her meditation by the impatient intruder who stood before her with a frown on his tanned face and a rather large package in hand.

"Oh, I'm sorry I didn't notice you come in. May I help you?"

She put on a practiced smile and took a step forward toward the bulky parcel. He smiled back and placed the pack beside the cash register, then turned toward her and said.

"A package for Hermione Granger?"

He put a clip board in her hand indicating the area at which she should sign. She did as instructed and frowned, a solemn air about her as she ripped away at the boring brown wrapping.

**_You don't think…_**

****

**Hope not. **

It was just as she had feared, they had already found her. She was hoping against all magical odds that Dumbledore would not discover her whereabouts. But alas. It is the magical world and it was the headmaster of Hogwarts; you couldn't have done much hiding even if you wanted to. This just reinforced Hermione's theory of magical "bugs" much like electronic devices used to track missing persons or something but instead this time it was used to find run away star students.

**_Crap._**

****

It was an assortment of letters and cards, most with "I'm sorry" sprawled all over them.

**News about the parentals has been distributed I see. **

**_Damn Weasleys…_**

****

There was a prefect badge buried underneath a tacky hand made sweater with a crummy golden H on it. She stared at it for a moment, wondering why this little piece of metal used to mean so much to her.

**_It's so…ugly. _**

****

And in truth it was, a shining example of all that was imperfect about her life. She carelessly threw it across the room, and began to inspect the rest of her "crap"

**Perhaps I shouldn't be so ungrateful…I mean, my parents did die and all. This is all understandable. **

**_It's all crap that's what it is!_**

****

There was a letter from mostly everyone she had ever met. Harry, Ron, Ginny, Colin, Pansy, Lavender, Luna, and some other people she really didn't remember.

**I feel loved…I think.**

It was all a jumble of apologies for things that weren't they're faults, congratulations about things they didn't care about, and promises of comfort and well-being.

All a bunch of idiocy really.

They didn't care; it was just an obligation to her. They weren't her friends they just needed good grades. They would expect her to be grateful and lean on them for comfort, they'd expect her to be "Friendly".

**_Freaks…_**

And then there was the fatal problem of explaining the whole witch thing to the "posse". In all her peace and love –ness she neglected to inform her new-found best friends of her situation and her life. How would she break it to Thorn?

It was just like Harry Potter to ruin a perfectly good moment; she was beginning to see what Voldemort must've felt like numerous times during his various encounters with "the boy who lived".

She hurriedly got rid of it all, not even giving the heartfelt letters a second thought, throwing them carelessly in the trash.

A long sigh escaped her lips, as she slowly closed her eyes wanting to think on things.

**Yep…they've found me. So now there's not doubt that I'll be expected back in Hogwarts, and if I don't show up…there's no doubt that I will be searched for…**

****

**_And the first place they'll look is here…_**

**And I don't want Thorn and Ronny in all of this. **

**_They'll get into to this somehow, but first you'll have to tell them…and we all know what a drama queen Thorn has proven himself to be. _**

****

**I'm going to have to tell them…**

She took a deep breath, sparing a glance at the pile of rubbish in the trash can. She picked up the Prefect badge, examining its molding.

"Why did I care so much?"

She sat down for a moment, eyes not leaving the gold emblem, racking her brain for a reason.

It was nothing, not even real gold. So why was this so important to her? In a fit of frustration the already battered up Prefect badge flew across the room, falling to the floor with a dull thud.

She sat there dejected and depressed, even letting a small pout grace her full lips. A perfect picture of innocence.

"Oh my god! You're adorable!"

No matter how depressed, sad, or dejected she was, Thorn always managed to make her laugh. He had burst through the doors in a complete frenzy, smiling and cooing at "Linn" like she was a small child.

"That little pout thing? Yes darling! YES! Work it! You could so seduce the bloody prince with that! Ugh! Your hot-ness makes me sick!"

She giggled at his antics, as he pretended to be offended.

"The pupil has surpassed the master I see"

Ronny appeared behind him, all smiles and laughs. It appeared she had had a good day. She put her coat up, and placed herself behind the counter, checking the sales. Hermione rolled her eyes at the lesbians' paranoia.

"I didn't steal anything!"

Ronny smiled sheepishly, still not getting over her suspicion of the young girl.

"Don't worry darling! Ronny does that with everyone! She's a greedy little miser, ain't she?"

Thorn sat next to Hermione, randomly playing with a lock of her hair.

"So my little darling…what have you been doing all day?"

Ronny rolled her eyes knowing Hermione's answer.

"I've been working my butt all day! And I think I deserve a little treat!"

"Oh yeah?"

Ronny challenged.

"How many sales have you made little Miss. 'Oh I'm such a slave'? Hmm?"

"15!! Thank God I'm on commission! Wouldn't be able to survive with the crap **you** would pay me!"

"Well then if you're so discontent, maybe I should just FIRE YOU!"

"You wouldn't! How on earth would you be able to find time to fuck that little hermaphrodite of yours?"

"SHE'S NOT A HERMAPHRODITE!"

"THEN WHY THE HELL ARE YOU FUCKING HER!?"

"…"

"That's what I thought"

"Well you're still a stupid **straight** clone of the world biggest **fag**!"

"And you can't tell the difference between a penis and a vagina! So whose sight impaired now huh?"

"Whore!"

"Sapphist!"

"Nymphomaniac!"

"**GAY** Nymphomaniac!"

"ARG!"

"VICTORY!"

"Ladies?"

Thorn thought it best to interject now. He had become quite used to these entertaining spats. Finding them a good giggle. But now was not the time. Ronny, still frustrated from the raunchy debate thought to ignore the two, and began to tinker with the antique cash register.

"Linn? You coming to dinner? Or do you have some hot date to be off too?"

Ever since the beginning Thorn had been trying to open up her sexual side. Refusing to believe that "Linn" his "creation" still remained a virgin. He had attempted to set off a number of blind dates for her, but of course Miss. Hermione Granger had her way, was as resilient as ever.

So "Linn" just rolled her eyes knowingly and replied.

"There's no need of you to ask. You know I don't have one"

He sighed, and dared a pout of his own. She rolled her eyes again, noting that two eye rolls in the same minute was most defiantly a record and said.

"No, that doesn't work on me Thorn, might work on Ronny, might work on Trey, may even work on the bloody queen of England. But it will never succeed with me."

"Ugh! You're to hot for your own good!"

**Authors Note:** I know, I know, why end it here? But I've been working on this for a while…and it's come to the point where I'm just procrastinating, and that's not good. Its 5 pages though so be happy! I'll try and give another chapter soon. I don't know…Finals are next week and all. Well Love you all and please review. NO FLAMES!

**Thank You**

**Griffen**

****

****

****

****


	4. Chapter Three Pt 2

**Authors Note: **I just submitted chapter three about an hour ago. And I reread it, and had to admonish myself. I really am sorry. I feel as though that chapter was not up to par, and I apologize. It was rushed. And that made it bad. So I'm submitting a following chapter, hoping that the last chapters' suckiness will be forgotten, and all will be forgiven. ****

**Thank You and Enjoy**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but that sucky last chapter…I really am sorry.

**Acute Anxiety**

****

****

"You're a **WHAT**?"

"Linn" grimaced at the feminine screech her rather feminine friend administered. Thorn had taken her out to dinner that night, wanting a little talk with his homemade orphan.

She had decided during the drive to _Savvie_s (a popular gay bar across town) that now would be the best time to break the news. It would be in public so she new that Thorn wouldn't make as much of a scene. But then again she couldn't be sure. It was Thorn after all; he was infamous for his histrionic tendencies.

So just to be safe she waited until dessert, quietly picking at her Chocolate Tall Cake without much of an appetite. He stared at her for a moment and finally asked.

"What's wrong?"

And that's how the outburst came about. She had started with Harry and Ron, explaining her relationship with the two, but managing to hide rather important magical details. And then seeing no other way, she let it out. Those three magical words every loving parent would like to hear... 'I'm a witch'.

It threw him into a fever no doubt, as he stuttered and stared, opening and closing his mouth like a distressed goldfish. She sighed out all frustration and repeated.

"I'm a witch Thorn…not Wicca or anything like that. I'm a witch…a **real** one. I go to school…Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry…"

She continued on. Telling him everything. From her first meeting with "The Boy Who Lived" to her suspicion of her parents murder. She was surprised that he stayed seated for it all. His eyes never left her, he let out a couple of unbelieving sighs here and there, but he didn't interrupt, just listened.

"And I'm sorry I didn't tell you before…I just wanted to forget it all…but when the package came, I knew there was no way I could stay without there being some sort of struggle, and I didn't want that. You guys have given me so much you know? So, yes, I'm a freak of nature…I even use a wand…I'm sorry"

She was on the brink of tears, and couldn't look at his sad face. He sighed for the hundredth time. Shaking his head, as if trying to keep in all of the information he just consumed. He looked at the tearful girl in front of him, and sighed once again.

"Why on earth…"

She looked up hopefully as he begun what she hoped was a long speech. The less talking she did the better.

"Why on earth…"

He repeated building up the suspense.

"Why on earth would you call yourself a freak of nature? Witch or not, you're still my Linn, and I'll still love you, if not even more. I'm not angry that you'd kept this from me, because if in your situation I would've done the same thing. Darling…just because you can point a little black pointer at someone and blow their arse to Antarctica does not make you any more special than the rest of us. Witch or not! And besides…that whole magic thing intrigues me. Pictures that move? I can't even imagine…Don't worry, I don't hate you. I couldn't! So…Miss. Hermione Granger…what's on the list? Any school supplies? 'Gowns'? Darling! Skies the limit! I never realized the prospect of having a magical teenage child till now! Oh! I could drab you up! Buy…BUY! BUY! And it's all magic too…my goodness…it's like an orgasm."

"Um…I don't think you should compare my shopping for school supplies to an orgasm…I don't think that…clean."

"Well, I don't think being a witch is clean either! Do they have toilets in this castle of yours?"

His total ignorance elated her, and she smiled in pure bliss. He wasn't angry, shocked, sickened or anything of the sort. He was fine with all her "oddities". And she loved him for it. The future looked brighter after this. If Thorn was willing to except her in her true form, maybe deep inside she wasn't ugly after all.

"Thorn! It's modernized; we don't live in the Middle Ages you know!"

"No, I'm sure you don't…so Linn…how bigs that wand of yours?"

"Thoooorn! Can't you keep your mind of off sex for 2 seconds?"

"No dear, I don't believe that possible"

He signaled for the waiter, and the young boy glided over with the check. He smiled flirtatiously at Hermione, and Thorn didn't miss a beat.

"Think she's a pretty little piece of pie don't you?"

The boy (whose shiny name tag stated his name to be Henry) blushed in embarrassment but quickly covered it up with a sly smile. Hermione wouldn't help but roll her eyes, and began to scrutinize him from head to toe, whilst Thorn worked some magic of his own.

"Yes…she is rather pretty"

She noted his cerulean blue eyes matched perfectly with his light blonde hair.

"Her names Linn, if you're looking for it"

"Linn? Beautiful…like its owner."

**_Now where have I heard that before?_**

****

She smiled at him, noticing his ears redden like a certain someone she used to know.

"Do you want a date?"

She had to hold back the urge to throttle her self-proclaimed 'pimp', as he began to take the forward approach.

"That would be lovely"

"Oh gods…please spare me!"

"Linn, don't be rude!"

Henry slightly disheartened by her cry of agitation, still pursued her interest never the less.

"So what do you say? Your friend here says you're up for it?"

With a cocky smile on her own lips, she looked up into those big blue eyes and simply stated.

"Fuck-off"

With that he scurried away in humiliation, sending someone else to bring back their receipt. Thorn glared at her, not approving of the attitude she took towards the "Perfectly handsome fellow, he had gone through the trouble of acquainting himself with".

She sighed again, as he began to ask questions about Hogwarts on the ride home.

"So…any lovely darlings you're interested in back there? I mean…I know you've already expressed complete animosity for those two retards of yours. But come on…there must be someone."

A brief thought flickered across her mind, but it was gone just as fast as it had appeared. There was no place for that arrogant Slytherin in her, mind or heart.

"Nope…no one"

"Well isn't that boring and virginal!"

"I'm sorry we're not all whores like you are"

"We'll I'm sorry we're not all stuck up little inexperienced, unstained, untouched, wannabe sluts like you are!"

"…You suck"

"Much cock"

----

"Come on darling! It's morning! We have to go to that Diagon Alley place, you were talking about remember? Ohh….I can't wait! Come on! Get up! We have to get you ready! GET YOU BLOODY ARSE OUT OF THAT BED HERMIONE FUCKING GRANGER! **NOW**!"

"Linn" almost wished she had never told Thorn of her past, grumbling herself out of bed; she stood exhausted in the middle of her bedroom, waiting for some new orders from the blowhard fag.

"Ok! My lovely little pet! Now we have to dress you up! You did say something about seeing those…those…"people" you called friends right?"

She winced at the thought of seeing Harry and Ron again, and Thorn noticing this, immediately dropped the subject. Instead he went through the closet of Pyrrhic Pixie Charity he had blessed Hermione with and looked for clothes agreeing to his tastes.

She practically collapsed on the carpet, not having enough energy to stand up for long. Stealing a swift glance at herself in the dresser mirror she frowned at the tired girl that frowned back, not looking forward to her meeting with the Golden Boys at all.

"Darling! You must understand something!"

She looked up at the young libertine man towering over her. A look of confusion on her delicate features. He reached down to brush a small lock of hair that was blurring her vision and continued.

"They know nothing of your change…All they can fathom at this very moment is that your parents are dead. Murdered by what you say is the greatest evil in the Wizarding World. This to them…is not a very good thing. They love you…the old you anyway. You left them in the cold Linn, with no explanations…nothing. You can't blame them…for being stupid. And besides…you're gonna be spending the whole year with them anyway! You're gonna have to see them sometime! And you're gonna be looking fabulous doing so!"

She smiled up at him, opening her arms for a much needed hug, and as always he complied, folding the small and petite girl into his arms.

She giggled mercilessly as he picked her up, swinging her around carelessly. Laughing himself, he dropped her on the bed and began to tickle her. Knowing all her weak spots gave him and advantage she couldn't override.

"STO…OP!

She was finding it hard to breath now, she was laughing so hard he was making it hurt.

"Please...I'll….I'll….DO ANYTHING!"

He stopped for a moment, a slight twinkle in his eye. She breathed normally again, sucking up all the oxygen she could before he decided what she had to offer was not good enough and continue.

"Anything?"

He asked, a sly and cocky tone to his voice.

"Anything!"

She knew she was digging her own grave, but it was better to breath then be stuck on that bed begging for mercy.

"Go on a date with my brother!"

She remained silent, quietly wondering if he had finally lost it.

"I said….Go on a date with Trey"

"Trey?"

"Trey"

She shook her head, not wanting to even think of that. Thorn had finally found her defect, knowing her had been harboring a small and slight crush for his brother, that was of course sure to go away by the time she left for school. He and Ronny joked about it constantly, because they both knew that Trey felt the exact same way. Thorn found Hermione's little side glances, and Trey's disabled speech when in the same room with her just adorable, and was determined that they should "hook up", after all he mused 'Who else could I expect her to lose her virginity to and not catch some creepy STD?'

She knew what he was thinking, and she despised him dearly for it. Living with a pervert would never work out for her or her virginity.

"No"

Came out her simple answer, he immediately pouted growling angrily at the stubborn girl.

"Why not?"

"Because it's best if you just leave it alone!"

He rolled his eyes at her, and sat down on the bed.

"How the hell are you ever going to get laid with this attitude?"

"I don't want to get laid Thorn…"

"But-"

"Can't you understand that my 'maidenhood' is a very big fucking deal to me? I mean, why the hell were we given it if it weren't meant to have gone to someone special?"

"You're a teenager, for fucks sake! You should be ready for this! You should **want** this!"

"But I don't…"

"You will"

Nothing more was said on the subject, they had come to an inevitable draw. He wouldn't force her too if she didn't want to. He had learnt a long time ago that that was not how Miss. Hermione Granger ticked.

"Go take a shower, everything we'll be out on the bed when you're done"

She acceded and got up heading toward the bathroom. He was still a bit frustrated at her uncooperativeness, but she made valid points. Another thing that annoyed him about the adoptee, she was always right…about everything!

'One day' he thought 'One day that'll be her downfall…'

"Never mind that…Have to find the perfect outfit for this self-made prodigy"

-----

In the bathroom Hermione was having problems of her own. She was letting the water run for a while, waiting for the hot water to make its appearance, but she was sure Thorn had used the last of it.

**I suppose that's what I get for not waking up earlier.**

But she still wasn't ready to face the prospects of taking a cold shower…just like she wasn't ready to face the prospects of seeing Harry and Ron again.

**_Why can't we just stay here?_**

****

**Because, we're going to have to face them sometime…as Thorn had said.**

"But why now?"

It was as she expected…there was only cold water left. She slowly got in, accepting the onslaught of freezing water and all it had to offer. After all…who was she to judge?

----

He had finally picked a silk corset with red skulls delicately splattered on the bust line. A short black pleated skirt would do for her he thought. Giving up his boisterous ways for Hermione's special moment, he picked up a simple black made to look tattered heart necklace. Knowing his "Linn" wouldn't want anything to over the top.

He sat down patiently waiting her return. Wondering what on earth was taking her so long.  He looked at the clothes hanging on the door, and rethought his decision. Thinking that perhaps with the corset she would be revealing too much, and that idea did not entertain him, neither would it her. He slowly remembered that he had designed the bodice himself…and had been smart enough to add detachable sleeves.

"Oh! I am a genius!"

He brought them out proudly, and admired their delicate work. He scowled at the thought of her spilling something on them, but quickly pushed that thought away.

"It's Hermione after all…she's to sensible for that"

Hermione came out of the bathroom as soon as she heard her name, already clad in underwear she felt no ill ease around Thorn, and he was gay after all.

"Wait! Let me do your make-up first!"

She conformed and sat down obediently. Waiting for him to start. He pulled out foundation, and lightly dabbed it on, then frowned and said.

"Even Alabaster Tone, is too dark for you…damn it Linn! You get paler by the second!"

She laughed at this and replied.

"It's because you keep me locked in all day, and when I do go out, you have me bundled up looking like a freaking blimp!"

"That's because pale is beautiful honey!"

"Then why are you complaining?"

"I'm not!"

He had switched over to Porcelain Tone, then cried out in impediment! Throwing the small bottle across the room, to his dismay it didn't even crack. She laughed at the look on his face and added on.

"Your little dramatic scene thing seems not to work as well as you planned"

"Shut up!"

He glared at her but continued still, deciding to go without foundation. Her skin was as perfect as can be anyway.

"Stupid whore!"

"Du ist Dirnen!"

"Oh! Don't even try the German on me honey! I know what the means!"

"No you don't! If you did! You would notice the wrong conjugation"

"…the wrong what?"

"Never mind"

"That's what I thought"

He slowly applied a bit of blush, adding a slight rosy look to her already pale character. He had found out along time ago, that there was no need to go over the top with little Miss. Granger, she always applied the finishing touches with her natural beauty, a thing to be envied of by the deceased Cleopatra herself.

He coated her eyes in dark coal, giving her a smoky look that made her honey eyes stand out even more.

He loved doing this with her, she was so obedient and trusting, it made him feel like her was caring for a priceless china doll, the only one in the world. Worth millions, and she truly was.

He curled her dark hair, and fluffed and played with it until it reached perfection. It was still black, and suited her pale complexion perfectly. If she was ever to go back to that boring she was before he had no clue what he would do.

"You'd probably shave it off and force me to go bald in public"

He blushed slightly not realizing he had said that aloud. Then laughed at the thought of her shaved head.

"Yeah, I probably would"

He smiled in satisfaction at his results, and then threw the clothes at her. Ordering in a droll tone.

"Put them on!"

She laughed at his attempts to be stern and severe, but followed par. Putting them on without a word. He fussed with the sleeves, noting how exquisite the clothes looked on her. The sleeved barley covered her shoulder leaving her chest practically bare. But she didn't seem to be complaining to why should he?

"Thorn this skirt is a little short don't you thing?"

"The longer the legs the faster the erection!"

"Thorn!"

"It's fine Hermione!"

She shut up quickly. But still showed her complaint in a cute pout.

"Oh stop it! You look fine!"

She looked at her reflection one last time and smiled.

"Yeah I do."

He pulled out a pair of boots, Black as usual with leather straps lined up on them, buckles every where. She put them on without a word, knowing that there was no use complaining, when Thorns mind was set on something at all to do with fashion you would and could never win.

"Ready?"

He held out his hand for her, helping her up.  She let out a long sigh, knowing that her time was nearly up.

"Ready"

----

"So where are we going again?"

Ronny had done nothing but complain and fight with Trey since they had gotten out of the car, and it was beginning to get on Hermione's last nerve, luckily as if reading her mind Thorn spoke up before she did.

"We're going shopping! You Sapphic Dingbat!"

"Well excuse me!"

"What for being a whore?"

"SHUT UP!"

"I'm not the one who fucked my dad's wife!"

"I DID NOT FUCK MY STEP MOM, WE WERE JUST **TALKING**"

"Then why the need to shout? You don't have to get all hot and bothered dear…you could've just told me a TOLERANT DECIBAL RANGE!"

"ARG!"

"Keep quiet now!"

"I hate you!"

"The feelings mutual!"

They walked in silence the rest of the way, as they approached that oh so familiar rather bland but still intimidating red brick wall Hermione had greeted so many time, a torrent of emotion flooded back into her. Thorn who immediately sensed something amiss asked.

"Linn? Are you alright?"

She just nodded meekly, taking another step forward, almost sensing the magical aura emitting from the wall.

"Where are we?"

Trey asked, confused about their location.

"Linn, this is a dead end"

"No its not…"

And with that she disappeared, they all gasped in surprise and took a step back. Ronny looked around her in bewilderment. Then looked to the wall in suspicion. Thorn was of course freaking out, tears and all.  Trey looked as though he was on the verge of tears too.

"WHERE THE HELL IS SHE?"

Thorn screamed out, but Ronny ignored him, getting closer to the wall…

"Maybe she's-"

"WHERE THE HELL IS RONNY? OH MY GOD! WE'RE STUCK IN A REALLY CHEESY HORROR MOVIE WHERE ALL THE BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE GET AXED!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!"

"Thorn! **Shut up!**"

Trey noticing the exact position of Ronny's departure pulled his hysterical brother along with him…

"Trey! What will the world do without my heavenly sex? Why? WHY?"

"Thorn…I don't need to know that!"

"But…but…the SEX!"

"Ugh! Stop!"

"It's the dick isn't it? God sees it fit to eliminate me because of my huge rod! WELL FUCK YOU TO THEN!"

"**STOP!**"

"What the hell took you so long?"

All of a sudden they were in a bar, as numerous people buzzed around, Ronny was on the floor laughing at the delirious Thorn, who was still throwing curses to the sky. Trey was blushing profusely underneath Hermione's formidable glare.

Thorn had quickly forgotten about his former dilemma and had quickly found a new one to spaz out about.

"What is **that**?"

He said rather loudly pointing rudely at a poor stranger who had done nothing to deserve the attention.

"Linn…what the **hell** is she wearing?"

"Linn" rolled her eyes at him for what seemed like the 50th time that day.

"They're Mary Janes Thorn…you know…shoes…"

He looked positively revolted and it sent both Ronny **and** Trey into a fit of giggles.

"Well tell her to take them of now! They're making me SICK!"

"Thorn shut up and suck it up! We are in the Wizarding World now; there are many fashion blunders here! You'll just have to live with it!"

"But-"

"Move!"

She led the group outside perceiving the astonished looks on the faces when a tall wizard apparated in front of them, he ducked his head in a greeting and disappeared into the pub.

"He had a **wand**!"

The three giggled, making it ever so obvious that they were muggles. Hermione quickly scowled at them, immediately shutting them up.  

"We have to go to Gringotts and exchange this money"

She declared taking of in a random direction, they quickly moved to catch up with her.

"Go to where?"

Ronny asked, wanting to know where the hell they were and how the hell they got there.

"Gringotts, it's a bank"

"Oh"

The three said simultaneously. She just rolled her eyes, but couldn't help it as a small smile crept on his face.

Perhaps there really was no need to dread this moment after all, with these three comical idiots following her. No one could or would touch her.

And besides…no one would recognize her looking like this.

**Authors Note:** Ok…after 3,667 words, I feel the need to stop…I've been writing none-stop for about 3 hours now…12 PAGES PEOPLE! Best appreciate…I still love you guys though…you all rock.

**Thank you**

**Griffen**

****


	5. Chapter Four

**Authors Note: ** Hello all! Thanks for reviewing, you guys are awesome! Love you all! So yeah…we got motivation peoples! Isn't that wonderful? Motivation! Motivation! Motivation! M'k, I'm done. I hope you like it. Sorry it took so long…I have been on vacation! ENGLAND! SOHO! Oh my god! It was awesome… By the way italics means whispering…BOO!

**Enjoy**

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Harry Potter…you know who I wanna own? Daniel Radcliffe…such a fine specimen.  And I don't own Scarling's version of "Creep" either.

**Creep in the Shadows**

****

****

****

"The one you were before,

Can't look you in the eye,

You're just like an Angel,

You're skin makes me cry"

A silhouetted figure in a dark and dismal room slowly danced to the morbid beat of the music. Immaterial tears flowing down her waxen face. She twirled around, hips swaying to the music, arms flailing about in absolute perfection.

"You flow like a river,

In a beautiful Waltz

I wish I was special,

Yes so fucking special"

Her figure illuminated by the moonlight, proved itself worthy of a graceful deity, the shapely frame was covered with a simple, short and snug black night gown. Her long dark tresses flowed elegantly around her lithe body.

"But I'm a creep,

I'm a loser,

What the hell is going on?

I don't belong here"

An alluring figure in the dark, she sang along bewitchingly, pouring her heart out in such a manner, one could not help but admire. She held a melancholic air, dancing around as if possessed by a mourning spirit. The tears would not stop, and she did not want them too.

"Don't care if you love,

I don't want to have control,

I want a perfect body,

I want a perfect soul"

She felt perfectly at ease in the night, no one could see her. They weren't meant to; it wasn't their place or their right. She wouldn't let them see her so weak and fragile...so pure.

"Want you to notice,

That I'm not alone

You're so fucking special,

I wish I was special"

_"Hermione?"_

She'd never answer again; she'd live here forever, and indulge these childish dreams. After all, it was her own right; they'd take away her innocence. Why not hide?

"But I'm a creep,

I'm a loser,

What the hell is going on?

I don't belong here"

There was nothing left for her out there anyway…

"If that makes you happy,

I love you more,

You're so fucking special,

I wish I was special"

"_Hermione?"_

"But I'm a creep,

I'm a loser,

What the hell is going on?

I don't belong here….I don't belong here"

She smiled to herself, knowing she would never answer to that name again. It was as if she a serpent, shedding different aspects of her personalities here and there as if they were nothing.

_"Hermione?"_

It wasn't their right…

_"Hermione?"_

To destroy her life…

**_"_**_Hermione?"_

It was not fair.

"Linn?"

Hermione awoke amidst hysteria, her mind wasn't placed and she had no idea where she was or what she was doing. Opening her eyes to an onslaught of light, she adjusted to her surroundings.

"Linn? Are you alright?"

She looked to her side to see Thorn smiling sadly at her; she smiled back, as was customary between the two.

She pulled herself up in slight discomfort, idly noticing that they were in a storeroom of some sorts, with her laying on a rather stocky couch.

"Thorn? What happened?"

Was all she could muster, she grimaced as a sharp pain assaulted her abdomen.

"You fell in when we were going to the bank, caused quite a scene actually, Ronny got some giant guy to carry you to the bookstore…You gave us quite a scare…had me bawling. I thought my little creation had died on me…Bloody Hell!"

He brushed a lock of hair out of her eyes and continued.

"You hit something on your way down, it knocked you out I suppose, Oh I don't know.  Ronny's gone out for a smoke, and Trey's gone to the loo. He has a small bladder you know? He pees the world out when he's nervous…always been like that. What happened to you darling?"

"I don't know…"

Silence followed. Thorn watched his adopted, scanning her small form making sure there were no bruises. He continued on explaining, hoping it would help her recollect her thoughts.

"A nice boy helped you get here. He said he knew you. There were two of them actually. Sounded so much like those boys you were telling me about. One had a funny scar on his forehead, told him he should cover it up with concealer. Don't think he listened. He is male after all…"

Her throat closed up, making it hard for her to breath. But she didn't make a sound, just listened to Thorns mindless rant as her breathing slowly stopped, and a lethargic feeling began to envelope her.

"Then the other one with bright red hair…ugh. Told him to dye it. It just didn't match…**anything**…there was a girl; she had flaming red hair too. Remarkably pretty--Linn? Linn? What's wrong!? Oh no you don't! Wake the hell up!"

He gave her an impromptu slap across the face, waking her up from a panicked daze. She breathed somewhat easily, still perplexed about the situation at hand. Thorn noticed this and sought to inquire about the cause of her discomfort.

"Linn? What's wrong?"

"Nothing Thorn"

She stood up with ease. Scared that when she walk out that door they'd be waiting for her.

"You thought they wouldn't recognize you huh?"

No matter how oblivious Thorn seemed to everything around him, he was always in sync with his surroundings. Something that aggravated her immensely.

"They are your friends; no disguise to remarkable can hide you from love"

"Shut up! You're making me sick! All this talk of 'love', if that's what you want to call that dreaded feeling…they don't 'love' me"

"Just because you refuse to be and advocate of love and peace, doesn't mean you have to shoot down everyone else's beliefs. Stop being a whore and face the STD's"

"You twist the world's purest thoughts into such vulgar, sexual things exceptionally well, you know that?"

"I practice…now go!"

"I-"

"Get you're scrawny ass out there…I'll be right behind you the whole way M'k?"

With that last word, he pushed her out the door. To face the "STD's" as he had put it.

The first thing she noticed was the look of concern etched into every single one of their faces. Most of them we're here, looking so unfamiliar in the confines of the dusty bookstore. None observed her appearance, just sat and worried their hearts out.

"Come on now"

Thorn whispered from behind her, pushing her into their view.

Harry was the first to look up, and her heart almost stopped.

**_Jesus! He looks so fucking…so fucking…SUICIDAL!_**

****

He was up in a flash, embracing the foreign entity known as Hermione "Linn" Granger.

"Herms!"

He breathed into her ear; she almost didn't believe this was real. He was so desperate, so needy, and so…nice. She stood stark still, not moving an inch. He noticed her unresponsiveness and slowly loosened his grip on her.

"Hermione?"

Looking past Harry's concerned face, she saw Ron, standing nervously in front of her. Ears tinged slightly red, his ability to look so pathetic got to her, and she almost felt guilty for not calling, writing, not attempting to make any form of communication with the forlorn Weasley.

They had both gotten taller, towering over her small petite form. Harry's hair messy as usual, hung in front of his eyes, interestingly enough they made his sparkling green orbs stand out even more.

Quidditch had done them both well.

"Hermione?"

She looked to Ginny, the one who had changed the most. She was taller than herself by at least an inch. Her fiery red her barely reached passed her shoulders, it was securely held back. Stretching out her forehead unflatteringly. "Linn" was surprised Thorn had not noticed this.

"Oh Merlin! Hermione! I didn't know where you were! You didn't write! You didn't call! I just didn't know what to do! You were gone without a word. Then we hear about your parents being killed by the Death Eaters, we were just frantic! We thought they had taken you! I…Oh Hermione"

Of course the female had to break down first, at any other situation she would've pushed Ginny off and admonished her for being the weaker sex. But this wasn't any other situation…this was the "grand" reunion. She had to play the part didn't she?

"I think she may need to breathe…"

Thorn took the words out of her mouth, or at least saved her from them. The trio looked towards the beautiful man in wonder, and then looked back to Hermione for answers.

She smiled at them and began introductions.

"Harry, Ron and Ginny, meet Thorn, Thorn meet the gang…"

He stepped up, making himself known. He was always one for attention, and in a way she was grateful for his imposing nature, it kept unwanted people away, he protected her. As he was doing now.

"Are you the one Dumbledore was talking about? You're the one whose been keeping Hermie safe?"

Harry asked, being the leader of the "gang" it was natural for him to speak first. Thorn cringed at Harry's endearing nickname for his beloved "Linn", replying.

"Oh? I'm already known then? Who is this Dumbledore fellow?"

"Our Headmaster"

Hermione spoke from behind him, Thorn laughed at this and said.

"I'm sure he's the master of a lot of heads!"

He laughed at his own joke, then seeing the look of horror on the alien teens that stood in front of him, he quickly took it back.

"Sorry couldn't help it…"

"Why didn't you write Hermione?"

Ron asked, completely ignoring Thorn, focusing everything on his best friend, this ruffled Thorn's feathers, causing his mouth to get the better of him.

"Because she wasn't ready!"

Hermione would be forever indebted to him. She silently thanked him for having the gall to speak all the words that wouldn't come out. She loved and appreciated the random man more, feeling safe and secure with him as a shield.

"This has got nothing to do with you! So you can bloody well sod off!"

Ron declared rather heatedly. Ginny sought to interject the foreboding battle to come, but with no success, Thorn was much to insulted to allow that to happen.

"Well I'm sorry you're a little brat with absolutely no idea what this little child of mine has gone through!!! You sit there in all your concern and worry acting as if the whole world has fallen on YOUR shoulders. Like you're the one who has gone through so much pain and anguish. Suck it up little boy! It's not your prerogative!"

"You're the one who stole her from us!"

"I **stole** her? Are you kidding me? She's the one who randomly came up to me! She's the one that ran away! I **saved** her! You should be thanking me! If it wasn't for me! You would've probably never seen her again. She's told me everything Ronald…every little detail! About everything! All of the mistakes you've made, all the things you've said or done to our poor little darling…all the crap, you've forced her through. Deal with it Weasel. She doesn't like you like that….and you!"

He pointed a finger accusedly at Mr. Harry Potter, putting the poor "Boy Who Lived" under the lime light.

"You! You! YOU! What is your problem? Her parents are dead! And you know whose fault it is? Hmm? Do you know? Death Eaters darling! DEATH EATERS! I'm just a lil' 'ol muggle! But even I know that sounds straight up demonic! But no! You just had to be the brave little Gryffindor! And put all of your friends in danger! Linn! I'm done! You're turn! Ronny, Trey and I will be waiting outside!"

He stormed out in a flurry, leaving Hermione unprotected with three of her worst nightmares in his wake.

"I- I-"

She started.

"Don't! Let us talk this time"

Ginny put up her hand, sighing in frustration. Eyes looking to old for her face.

"It's our turn to rant…Why did you leave? Why didn't you tell us what happened? You called Harry 2 days after your parents were found murdered, acting as if everything was fine! Why did you keep this all to yourself?! Don't just stand there and look helpless! **Answer Me**!"

"Like you would've cared anyway! If I had even attempted to share anything with you, you would've just sat there and nodded your head, mimicked my tears, and said in that same sympathetic monotone voice 'It'll be okay'. Like you knew everything about **anything**!"

"How the hell can you say that?! How can you say such hateful things? You-"

"I don't know, maybe I've been possessed by Voldemort! Who knows?"

That was low and she knew it. The three simultaneous gasps did not deter her, she stood brave, stubborn and defiant in front of them. Waiting for one of them to say something back.

Ginny too hurt to continue retreated behind her brother, as he stood up to take the "bat".

"And you Mr. Ronald Weasley!"

"Hermione shut up!"

"**NO**"

"Listen to me! We love you! I don't understand what your problem is but we'll get through it!"

"It just has to be my problem doesn't it? It always has to be my fault. You don't think, that maybe it's my association with you that started this whole mess. You haven't even seemed to figure out that…that, I don't need you?!?!"

"Hermione! You can't mean that! You don't!"

"Oh yes I do!"

Before Ron could even get another word out, Harry interrupted.

"I'm sorry alright? Is that what you're looking for? I'm sorry for everything! I'm sorry you ever met me! I'm sorry for this scar! I'm sorry I was born, I'm sorry you ever met me…I'm sorry that you were nice enough to take pity on me…nice enough to care, I'm sorry, **I'm sorry!**"

He stood defenseless, taking the blame for everything had to be the norm for him now. That scar served as a constant reminder of the invariable danger he would always be in. All he could do was apologize and fight harder for the next time around.

She knew that at one point she would have to forgive him, and peace would have to be made. But why did it have to be now? Without looking back she walked past the fractured trio, tears falling fast, she broke out into a sob when she hit the pavement. Thorn was immediately by her side, knowing what a blunder she had made, hoping she would change her mind, storm back in there and make amends.

But he knew she wouldn't listen.

So instead he lead her away from it all, disappearing into the crowd. Knowing they wouldn't dare follow.

They had booked three rooms in a hotel nearby Diagon Alley. Thorn had tried his best to explain everything to Ronny and Thorn, who still just happened to be stuck on the witch bit. He had given up five minutes into the conversation, giving them each 50 quid to do what they pleased. He knew that neither of them would be back by morning, so a night of rest and relaxation was in store.

His Linn had not said much about what had happened in the book store, but having heard it all anyway he had no questions that needed to be answered.

"Thorn?"

"Yes darling?"

He had drawn a nice hot bath for the young woman, and had deposited her in it about an hour ago. Neither of them speaking a word, he appeared in the bathroom as soon as she called ready to help her.

"What did I do wrong? Tell me how much of a fool I was back there. Tell me what to do to make it all right…"

She stood dripping wet in nothing but a flimsy towel to cover her gracious curves, her hair fell in a matted mess behind her, thick clumps hanging in front of her face, bags under her eyes managed to dent her magical beauty a bit. But she still controlled her natural fairness. Making Thorn wonder how such a beautiful girl could have such a gruesome life.

"Linn…"

"Tell me!"

She was determined as ever, reminding him of her actions at the bookstore, when she was with her "friends".

"You…you were brilliant. But you said all the wrong things. I don't know anything else apart from what you've told me, and I must say sweetie, parents dead or not. You have no right to take it out on Harry."

He picked up a towel, beginning to dry her hair as he continued.

"That poor boy didn't even know his parents. It's not really his fault he is such a target, that scar…he did not intentionally carve that thing into his forehead; he didn't order the Death Eaters to come to your house and kill your loved ones. He didn't map his life out like this…you're his friend for a reason. I remember you told me that you wanted to help him right? That he needed everyone's and anything's love for the battle ahead. You said that you would sacrifice your own life for Harry's, you nearly did once…didn't you? You shouldn't- you shouldn't have taken it out on them like that. They have done nothing. Maybe acted a little selfish along the way, but you're teenagers, rifts in relationships come and go…you may not like it but—love is all that matters?"

By now he had gotten her in bed, had her listening to every word. She was tearing up already, his speech hitting her hard.

"But I think you should still hold a grudge! They recognized you for gods' sake! Hair and all! Sort of demeans my work don't you think?"

She laughed at his selfish joke. Smiling for the first time that night, he could do nothing but smile back.

"What do I do about tomorrow? I know they'll be there…I-"

"Just go and say hello, you haven't finished our tour yet. Trey's just itching to go to that 'Quidditch' store."

"I meant about-"

"Shhhh darling…don't worry about it. Procrastination never hurts anyone! Now sleep!"

Hermione looked towards her gay counterpart who slept beside her, silently thanking him once again for all the help he had given her. She slowly crept out of bed, exchanging Pajamas for a black tank and pleated skirt.

Quickly adorning her boots she was out the door by his next intake of oxygen. She strolled down the hallway, idly noting the strange noises coming from Treys room next door.

"Perv…"

She continued down the hallway to the elevators, stepping into its glossy confines with apt satisfaction with her planned out schedule.

Reaching the bottom floor she sauntered up to the front desk, putting up her best smile she waited for the man named "Mike".

"Hello, May I help you?"

He was an old man of no more than 45, she figured the youthful nickname was a way for him to reinvent himself and she couldn't help but laugh at the idea.

"Yes I'd like to-"

"Linn? Where the bloody hell am I?"

She was interrupted by a rather disheveled blonde lesbian, who slowly staggered towards her.

"Ron?"

Ron fell into her arms rather ungracefully holding on to the desk for dear life.

"Have you been out the whole night?"

Linn questioned, wondering what the fashion prodigy had been up too.

"Uh-huh…I came back though…Yep …I did! And I went into the Hotel room…and there was Trey…with this…bloody…whore (blonde whore I might add) and they were listening to my Dir En Grey CD…MINE! And I freaked out…seriously…I don't know what's wrong with me…I drank to much…danced to much…and popped to many pills…fucking A! My head hurts!"

"Come on then"

Hermione hoisted the inebriated girl onto her back, noting that Ron was one skinny lesbian.

"If I puke on you I'm sorry…No I'm not…you'd fucking deserve it…all those times you turned down Trey-'the sex god'- what the fuck is wrong with you? I'd do him"

"You like girls…"

"Yes…but that's the thing about Trey…he's the **reason** I like girls"

"You're gonna wake up in a couple of hours and realize what a bloody fool you're being"

"You're one to talk little Miss. Blame Everyone Else for Everything"

"I'm not the one who's pumped up on drugs!"

"Well you know…it's for a fucking good cause so hah!"

"What cause?"

"He doesn't want me!"

And with that Ron began to sob, mixing snot, sweat, and tears into one big horrid stain that decorated Linn's brand new shirt.

"What the fuck?!?! Since when do you care about Trey?"

"Since Year 6…"

"I'm seriously missing something…"

"You're brain…hahaha…brain…Trey has a brain…it's really pretty…and big…just like his cock…"

"Ok! Enough!"

"His dick was beautiful…you'd just look at it and BAM! Instant orgasm!"

"I can't do this!"

In transparent distress and disgust from what she just heard. She deposited Ron in the elevator, pressed a button and never looked back.

Ron, now all alone and feeling very claustrophobic, began to curse the world for all her bad luck.

"Fucking cunt whores…shit…what the hell is wrong with me? I mean…holy fuck…Linn was right to leave me here…stranded and desperate…pumped up on X…and totally oblivious…to everyday shit....I just want to fuck him…is that too much to ask?"

The elevator pinged a reply opening its doors for her exit.

"Why thank you, you automated piece of shit!" 

She exited…trying to figure out the way to her room.

"204…204…204…208…207…206…205…20**4**!"

The door had thankfully been left open, ignoring the strange sounds she barged in without a care in the world. Eyes shut tightly. But the moans and the laughter continued even with her standing right there.

"What the fuck-Oh"

Opening her eyes she realized…they were just playing twister…her twister none-the-less. Trey looked up and smiled at her, eyes inviting.

"Hey Ron. Where've you been?"

She ignored his question and focused on the girl…who just happened to be wearing a maid uniform, her mind wondered once again. 

"Why is she dressed like that?"

Ron pointed accusedly at the innocent bystander, who looked up at her in return then started spewing crap out in Spanish.

"She's a maid silly"

Trey laughed at her as if she was a child, and then turned to the girl who was now stood erect and said something. She smiled waved at Ron then left.

"What? You traded sex for a passport?"

Said Ron, glaring at Trey.

"Shut the hell up! She said she liked the game and had played it once before, so I was just being nice and-what the hell is it to you?"

"Fucking Cunt Trey! Can't I have any fucking feelings? About ANYTHING? Even when we were together you used to pull all this shit off with me! Fuck! I have a heart too!"

"Well we're not together anymore, that was a long fucking time ago…"

"Who the fuck cares? This maybe the alcohol speaking…but…I still wanna fuck you"

"Don't do this"

"You wouldn't let me…"

"Just go to bed"

"Fuck you Trey…forever and always"

She began to undress, totally ignoring his presence.

"Ron…"

She took off her shirt, throwing it in his direction.

"Don't fucking do this!"

She unbuttoned her skirt, and then wiggled her hips out of it. She wasn't wearing any underwear.

"Shit"

"Thorn?"

"Shhhhhhhhhhhhh!"

"I just saw Ron…."

"Shut the hell up!"

"What are you doing?"

"Shut **_up!_**"

Thorn was plastered to the wall, obviously eavesdropping on the conversation next door.  Linn looked at his clothes with a raised eyebrow totally ignoring his strange, outlandish antics.

"Thorn…why are you wearing a tiara?"

"_Because I'm a princess darling!"_

He whispered back.

"But the shoes…"

They were fuzzy bunny slippers…obviously not his. And not hers either.

"_A bunny princess! Now shut the fuck up and come and listen!"_

"But Thorn…where did you get those?!?"

"LISTEN!"

With a dejected sigh she joined him at the wall, carefully pressing her ear against its cold exterior, suddenly filled with curiosity. Wanting to know what the hell was so fascinating in the room next door.

And then she heard it…A _moan_.

Thorn giggled like a maniac at the on her face.

"Is that…"

"Yep…that's Ron!"

"OH MY GOD!"

"Shhhhhhhh! Trey will hear us…"

"_Trey?!?!"_

_"Yes Trey!"_

_"Well when I was helping Ron she was spewing on about him…but I didn't think!"_

_"Honey…even I didn't think…even though I met Ron through Trey, I didn't realize…oh I don't know…they met each other in Year 6. I was in secondary school. I remember it well. They were together until Trey hit college…then…I don't know. It just ended. They were each others first…it was such an adorable relationship. I remember the night they spilt. Ronny came crying to me…she spent about 3 months in my apartment, until Trey opted to move out of theirs…I mean…they lived together for fucks sakes!"_

_"Wow…"_

_"What had happened was…Ron came in the room. And Trey was there with this retard Spanish chick…think they were playing twister-"_

_"Twister?"_

_"Shh! Don't interrupt! Anyway…Then she left, and then…_"_What? You traded sex for a green card?" Ron said. "Shut the hell up! She said she liked the game –a likely story- and had played it once before, so I was just being nice and-what the hell is it to you?" He replies.  "Fucking Cunt Trey! Can't I have any fucking feelings? About ANYTHING? Even when we were together you used to pull all this shit off with me! Fuck! I have a heart too!" She's playing the sympathy card.  "Well we're not together anymore, that was a long fucking time ago…" I was pissed when he said that…"Who the fuck cares? This maybe the alcohol speaking…but…I still wanna fuck you" Now that shocked me!  "Don't do this" That was where he had started to give in…"You wouldn't let me…" I thought she'd given up on the whole thing when she said that. "Just go to bed" Totally dismissing her. "Fuck you Trey…forever and always" I think she was crying. Then she started to take of her clothes, I could hear the movement. "Ron…" He sounds completely aroused_

_"Don't fucking do this!" There he sounds desperate. Bet ya she wasn't wearing any undies. "Shit" And then that's when the monkey business started…" _

_"Thorn?"_

_"Yes love?"_

_"How the hell can you remember that whole conversation, but then not even remember to brush your fucking teeth in the morning?"_

_"I don't know dear…and don't say morning…it's such a horrid time of the day…"_

**Authors Note: **4,500 words.****Sorry it took so long I was working on it before vacation…and didn't get a chance to finish. Just got back from England on Thursday…I hoped you liked it. Please review and no flames!

**Thanks**

**Griffen**


	6. Chapter Five

**Authors Note: **Hello all! Ok, I do have a reason as to why there haven't been any updates as of late ::nods:: Yes, I do. You see…there's been this HUGE writers block that I've been drowning in for a while now, I must've started at least 8 openings, all of them a good 7 pages long…but none of them were…right for me. Then would you believe it? An idea came to me, and then serenity. I had the perfect opening, and I now know what to do…happy no? ::smiles:: once again I apologize, I now leave you with a few wonderful words…DANIEL RADCLIFFE IS DAMNED SEXY!!!

**Enjoy**

****

****

****

****

**Disclaimer: **I own not Harry Potter…but…but…I WAAAAAAAAANAAAAAAAAA!!!!

**Pharisaic Purity**

****

****

****

****

Cold as snow, Hermione had no idea what to do next. This was her idea, her plan, her big moment. Yet she was still lost.

**_Lovely…once again Hermione, you astound me…_**

**Shush…**

Taking a few steps she began to recognize her surroundings. The Leaky Cauldron to her left, and Gringotts down the street, all familiar places to her, with familiar memories.

"I knew I shouldn't have done this without Thorn"

**_No duh…_**

She walked past the bookstore aimlessly, knowing it wouldn't be open at this hour. Nothing was open at 4 o'clock in the morning. A cold gust of wind assaulted her, she pulled her winter coat even closer to her body, her teeth chattered noiselessly as if warning her of how sick she would be in the morning.

Closing her eyes in despair, she crept into a dark alley. Leaning against the wall, a soft sight escaped her lips. Tears threatened to flow out, as Hermione slowly realized how much of a fool she was being.

**_Hiding in the shadows like a little baby…_**

**I'm not hiding Linn…I'll never hide from them.**

**_Whatever you say Hermione, I hope you realize that you present a pretty damned pathetic sight just standing here like this…_**

**I'll stay right here if I want too**_…_

**_Why do you insist on fucking your self up? You're you Hermione! You don't throw yourself into the fire without any protection! You're so much fucking smarter than that. Why the fuck are you here? Alone!?!?_**

**They need to see me, I'm being nothing but selfish hiding behind Thorn, he's not always gonna be there to protect me…I still am going to school remember, he can't be with me forever. **

**_Then don't leave…too much damned hassle! _**

**I'd be a spoilt little child not to go. **

**_Why did you run away in the first place? Why did you run from everyone? Huh? Wasn't it to get away from them all?_**

**It was to get a break…get some time to myself…no matter what I do Linn, I can't run away from them. I am a mudblood after all…filth! They'd find me soon enough! **

**_Go back to the hotel Hermione…_**

**No. **

She stood up in defiance, straightening her hair and wiping the tears from her eyes, she decided to walk back up to the bookstore and wait there for them to open.

**_Hermione, please…please go back. We're not ready for this, please don't…_**

"No"

She walked with determination, fire building inside her heart. She wasn't going to run again, she was going to face them all, no tears no nothing, this time…she would listen.

**_Hermione…_**

**My holiday is over Linn…**

She stepped up to the door, surveying the closed sign with slight boredom. Still fighting the war in her mind, she looked back to the Leaky Cauldron, thinking of the exit, thinking of going back.

**_Please…_**

Shaking her head in confusion she tried her best to shut the voice up, resolved in her decision.

**_You're selling your soul Hermione, your one chance to get out and you blew it. _**

The voice turned malicious, reminding her of the old days, before she knew Thorn and Ronny, before her parents died…her self criticizing alter ego, forever judging her, demeaning, and mauling her mind. She remembered it all too well, and despised herself for it.

**I hate you. **

Pressing her forehead to the cold glass door, Hermione did all she could, cried her heart out. Dark locks fell into her face, hiding it from any bystander. The last thing she needed was a nosy witch.

"The one you were before…

Couldn't look you in the eye…"

Singing quietly, she didn't notice the lamp posts lights shut off.

"You're just like an angel…

You're skin makes me cry…"

A few people walked by her, staring curiously at the young witch, straining to hear what she was singing.

"You flow like a river…

In a beautiful waltz…"

Pressing her forehead even closer, the freezing stained glass door, did little to soothe her aching head.

"I wish I was special…

Yes so fucking special…"

The sound of polished dress shoes clicked behind her on the cobblestone pavement. Stopping directly behind her, the old man surveyed the adolescent seemingly stuck to his door.

"What a beautiful voice you have there Miss, may I help you?"

There was no response from the girl, who continued to sing on, not minding him at all. Stepping closer he asked once.

"Excuse me? Miss…are you alright?"

She slowly turned towards him, her eyes darting for an escape route, she looked fearful and took a step back when he drew forward. He noticed this and did his best not to alarm her, after all his years of working in Diagon he had never come across a situation like this before.

She shook her head at him, her long black mane shielding her face from his worried stare.

"Miss…I'm not here to hurt you…please…are you alright?"

"I'm fine…do you need something?"

Her tone was curt and too the point, she hid her anxiety well.

"I was just about to ask you the same, you see, I own this small bookstore, and am not used to getting many people show up at my footsteps, not with that big one down the street. They get all the business when it comes to students...do you go to Hogwarts Miss? If so, I suppose you're looking for the books on your list…"

Coming up toward her, he tapped at the door knob with his wand, waiting for her to go in first. He smiled warmly at the girl, not wanting to scare her away. She glanced at him wearily, but conformed none the less. Strolling into the bookstore with some ease. She sat down on the nearest available seat.

Following her in, he closed the door, and took off his coat.

"Chilly isn't it?"

Hermione was too busy staring at the walls of books surrounding her, it seemed they were piled high all the way up to the heavens. There was of course no ceiling, they served no purpose in the Wizarding world…none at all… Looking up caused to much of a strain to Hermione's neck, forcing her to look back down into the old mans smiling face.

"Would you like a cup of tea? I hardly ever get any business around here you know?...so when I do, I always make sure to treat them like family"

She simply nodded, scrutinizing the old man in the process.

He was short, and a little plump, quite resembling a hobbit, with his long gray hair and beard. All he needed now was a pipe to finish of the picture. Taking off his bowler hat, he dusted it off and placed it on the chair next to her, then disappeared behind the curtain behind the pile of astronomy books.

**_Well then…_**

**I don't need you right now…**

**_Fine…_**

"Here we go…"

The man came back again, placed a china cup in front of her, then settled himself down and began to sip on his own.

"My name is Frederick by the way, as you already know, I own this shop…have for about 50 years now…it goes when I go, that's the old saying isn't it?"

He broke out into laughter at his own joke, the sound was nice, it reminded Hermione of her grandfather. The old fart died when she was a mere 4.

"Mine is He- Linn, its Linn."

He smiled at her for a moment, acceding she smiled back. Picking up the delicate cup with her gentle hands, she took a gulp of the warm liquid which she immediately recognized to be melted chocolate. He watched her reactions with a boyish smile. Eyes twinkling like that of Dumbledore, he laughed when she placed the cup down in confusion.

"If I'm not mistaken Mr. Frederick, you offered me tea…"

He laughed again, and with a hearty smile replied.

"I find this much nicer, makes you warmer, don't you feel all the more better?...and its Professor by the way…used to work at Hogwarts you see…a fine school that was"

He mused silently, waiting for her to say something.

"What did you teach?"

Deciding she took too long to respond, he totally ignoring her question, he decided to ask his own.

"You're Hermione Granger aren't you?"

With a quick blush, she looked down at the floor. Not wanting to assess the situation, he noticed this, but still continued on.

"You're that girl Dumbledore's been going crazy looking for…Hogwarts best student missing in action…he was worried to death…practically sending out troops to find you…just like my brother…I must say dear, you should've seen him when he finally found you…all frantic one minute, then perfectly calm the next…the man is an open book of bipolar"

Her continued silence irked the old man, who was expecting a response from the runaway.

"He's found you now, they can't get to you…you won't be seeing those damned death eaters unless they kill Dumbledore first…and that is a hard task I must say, I've known the man all my life…a hard ass if I ever saw one…would you like some more 'tea'?"

"Yes, thank you"

He disappeared again, but was back just as fast as he was gone, placing a second cup down on the mahogany coffee table, he looked back up at her with smiling eyes, hands fiddling with his mismatched tie.

"You were hear for books you said? I have an apprentice who works here, about the same age as you, if not a few years younger…pretty as a petal, even I must say, but I'm only an old man, it is expected of me…Are you alright?"

She finally looked up at him, and he saw the same look she had given him when her eyes first met his outside the store naught but 20 minutes ago. Complete and concrete fright. Tears were already pouring down, and he immediately realized that maybe that was not the best subject to start off on…

"I'm sorry Miss. Granger! My mouth sometimes gets the best off me, I do apologize…"

"It's alright…"

"No, no, please, don't cry on my account dear girl…you're much to pretty for rubbish like me…come on now. Here you go use this"

He placed a slightly perfumed handkerchief in her hand. Pure silk she noted, as she dabbed at her eyes softly.

"You feeling better?"

She nodded her head slowly…not noticing the jingle of the front door open.

"Mr. Frederick? Could you please help? A new batch of 'Mythical Wizards and the Women They Slept With' just came in could you please-…oh my!"

A loud bang stopped Hermione's sniffling and her eyes immediately sought the origin of the sound. Her eyes met with Ginny's not at all noticing the books sprawled all over the floor, throat constricting, she slowly stood up. Beginning to notice how small the room was.

Dropping the silk handkerchief on the floor, she squeaked inaudibly. Mr. Frederick looked from his assistant to Hermione in confusion, not really realizing what was going on…

"Hermione……"

Tears came just as fast for Ginny, who was crying on the spot, she stepped back for a moment, as if recalling all of Hermione's words in her head. Eyes never leaving that of her best friends.

Hermione on the other hand, was looking for a quick escape route, no matter how many hours of training she had used to prepare herself for this situation, her fright and panic just couldn't be fought, she had to run, as fast as she possibly could.

Ginny was now closing in on her, taking a few steps at a time, still crying, but trying her best to stop, she wanted to comfort her lost friend, needed to help her.

But Hermione just didn't seem to want to play along. As soon as Ginny was too close for comfort she bolted for it, knocking the coffee table over in her attempt to jump over it, the books didn't stop her, she was out of the door and into the cold rain in a flash, leaving Ginny alone in her tears. Beginning to shake in distress, Ginny quickly fell down to the floor, hands covering her face as tears attempted to drown her. Mr. Frederick stared at the flailing door in apprehension, still not knowing what was going on, he left Ginny alone, determined to inform his brother of these events.

"Albus…what in the 7 hells have you gotten me into this time?"

Out in the rain, Hermione had no where to run…she was soaked now, and had run as far as Madame Histania Beauty Parlor, a good 40 shops down from Fredericks Wonders. Looking up into the dark cloudy sky, she seemed out of tears to cry. Face blank, and mood low, she began to wander again. Retreating back into her mind as she always did when overwhelmed.

**_…That was brilliant, after all that damned talk, you couldn't even say hello._**

**I underestimated her effect on me is all…I didn't plan well…at all…**

**_Planning has absolutely nothing to do with it Hermione, you were chicken, plain and simple._**

**Like you could've done any better…**

**_I never wanted to do this in the first place, now she knows we're here, and she's gonna call the others, who are gonna try and look for us…you heard what that man said. Dumbledore had a damned army out for us! _**

**Screw it! All I came for was my school list that's all! **

**_Liar!_**

****

**Just shut up…please god, just shut up…**

Having no where else to go, and in desperate need of a drink, she quietly crept over towards the Leaky Cauldron, hoping to god there was no one she knew there…Her hair sticking to her face in an unkempt and awkward manner…she was partly blinded by the thick clumps that practically poured themselves in her eyes. Forcing her to not observe the rowdy crowd in the cauldron, they all seemed to match in their green, silver, and black house colors…

* * *

Draco quietly lounged on the couch at the far end of the bar, a fellow Slytherin girl was talking to him, hands moving animatedly to accentuate whatever point she was making, it didn't matter anyway, he wasn't listening, he never would. Casting a quick glance at her, he was rewarded with a blush that crept all the way down to her ample cleavage…

'Maybe tonight..'

He mused, eyes moving back to the entrance of the Cauldron, eyeing its newel arrival in boredom, he took another swig of his butter beer, as the Slytherin droned on. His attention was caught momentarily, a small woman stalked into the Cauldron, she was soaking wet from the rain outside, causing her thin jacket to cling to her tasteful body. Her pitch black hair, wet as anything, fell down to the small of her back, a good part of it hiding her pale face from him. She removed her jacket upon entry and threw it on her supposed chair…revealing milk white skin that her dress chose to bare, she sat down at the table, alone and silent. Not noticing the many Slytherin celebrating around her, she quietly ordered a drink, which he was surprised to find was fire whiskey…what a choice for such a feeble looking thing.

He stood up lazily, automatically dismissing the girl. She treaded off in obedience, not wanting to offend him. With a matured air, he glided up to the woman's table…

"Hello…pouring out here isn't it?"

He was leaning against her table, staring out the window as if fascinated…for a moment the world had stopped for Hermione, and now she could see no possible way her day could've been worse. There was Draco Malfoy, in the flesh…with all his little Slytherin groupies right behind him, of course he'd be a prat and not recognize her, of course he'd be blind and follow his penis, of course! What the hell else could you expect from a Malfoy!?

With all her possible might, she fought the urge to pour her drink on his head, knowing it wouldn't be a very smart move, not with future death eaters crawling all over the damned place. Once again, Hermione was trapped. He seemed to be talking she registered, staring at his mouth as it moved, wondering what stupid, inane thing could by flying out of this time…looking him up and down, a small smile formed on her lips as her deep rooted animosity flew back to her. His mouth was still moving, didn't seem to want to stop, god knows she wasn't going to try and stop it. The more he talked, the quicker she could getaway. And knowing Draco, he wouldn't be over in awhile.

**Pompous, arrogant, weak bastard…**

**_When you really think about it…this is Draco's fault…all of it…lynch him! Now! Do it Hermione! You know you wanna hear his girly scream! Cause you know he has one! _**

****

**Little barbarian! He's still talking! God! Will he ever stop?!?!**

**_Uh…No!_**

****

Slowly picking up her jacket, she tucked it underneath her arms, preparing herself for departure…she eyed, the exit that led into the muggle world.

**I could go out that way, and come in the other…he wouldn't bother to look for me…**

**_You'd hurt his pride…yeah he would…or he'd send Death Eaters…_**

****

**Not funny…at all…**

**_Just run for it, he's too scared to get wet, it muss up his perfect hair…he's a pussy remember?_**

****

**Damned Malfoy…always showing up when they're not needed…**

**_It's only 12 o'clock, all that time you spent wandering around like a lost dog…you set yourself up for this, this is your punishment…you deserve this…ha!_**

****

**Shut it!**

There was no other choice but to run out the back way, taking out her wand in preparation she shifted in her chair, making it easier for a fluid escape. Without a sound, she crept out of her seat, and slowly backed up, and as soon as he was looking elsewhere, she darted for the exit.

Safely outside, she stopped to catch her breath. Laughing in between gasps of air, she wasn't getting anywhere. Tears soon leaked out and it looked as if she was choking, now her abdomen was killing her, and she grabbed it in pain, but still wasn't able to stop giggling.

"He's ridiculously embarrassing! Hahaha… Disgusting! Hahaha… Absolutely a pretentious, bombastic, high-flown, grandiloquent dunce…I can't believe he's ever gotten any in his whole life…my god…that was absurd!"

Turning around the block, she greeted the rain with delight. Skipping through it like a mad woman, she was a perfect picture of an oversexed teenager…except, she wasn't so sexed…still laughing, she spun began to spin around, not at all minding who she was running into, they all thought she was crazy…

"AND MAY I ASK, YOUNG LADY, WHAT IN GODS NAME DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING!?!?!?!?!"

**_Uh-oh…you're screwed…again…_**

****

Thorn stood in front of her, soaked to the bone himself, looking not at all happy. Behind him, Ronny and Trey were huddled underneath a small umbrella, both glaring at her.

"WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?!?!?!"

Never mining the fact that his screeches practically halted traffic he continued to scream, arms flailing about in anger.

"ANSWER ME YOUNG LADY!!! **NOW!!!**"

"I went shopping…in Diagon…"

"WITHOUT ME!?!?!?! OH HERMIONE FUCKING GRANGER!!! YOU ARE SO DAMNED **_GROUNDED!!!_**"

* * *

"So you ran away?"

After, plenty more screaming, and a couple of shoes thrown in her general direction. Hermione had been dragged back home, forced into a bath and clean clothes, and was now being questioned.

They were locked into the storage room. A large wooden table, one lamp and 4 chairs were all the furniture needed.

Trey and Ronny who both felt they had a say in this, being dragged out into the rain and nearly catching their deaths on her account, they believed they had a say in her punishment. Thorn, who sat in the middle of them, directly faced Hermione, giving her nothing to look at but a stony face laced with adamant anger.

"Yes, after I saw her I freaked, I wasn't ready…at least I couldn't do it on my own"

She tried her best to explain, but she knew they weren't buying it. Her leaving on her own in itself was a pretty damned selfish thing to do, and it doesn't look they felt very forgiving. At least not today.

"Then?..."

Thorn hadn't uttered a word, apart from the mandatory questions, he felt no need to bitch just yet.

"Then I wandered around for a couple of hours…"

"YOU SPENT 3 HOURS WANDERING!?!?!?! WHILE WE WERE SCOURING LONDON LOOKING FOR YOU?!?!?!?"

Ronny screamed at her, clearly taken pleasure in scaring the poor girl out of her wits, she sat back down in her seat with Thorns prompting, a glare still set in her azure eyes.

"Then?"

Thorn asked again.

"I went into the Leaky Cauldron and got something to drink…"

"Which was?"

"Fire Whiskey…"

"_Explains the damned skipping…"_

Trey whispered to the side, unaware they could all hear him. Thorn, stood up for a moment, turning around as if in contemplation. Quickly glancing back at Hermione, he began to walk to and throe…

"So Miss. Granger…you're trying to say, that you made a mistake…a selfish, pointless, childish, narrow-minded, covetous…mistake?"

Never seeing Thorn like this before, she simple nodded, not wanting incur his wrath once more.

"This mistake included, sneaking out of the hotel at 4 am in the morning, giving the receptionist the ridiculous idea that you were a hooker and that I was running a whore house in the hotel room because of my so called 'suspicious behavior', therefore kicking us out without a right explanation…walking around London at a very dangerous time, and forcing us to try and find you…going to Diagon Alley, seeing the reason you went there in the first place…then running away…not confronting it…doing nothing for 3 hours, while we were hit on my herpes infested wannabe Michael Jackson's in the wrong side of Soho…then going to a bar…then drinking alcohol…what lovely achievements my underage friend…FUCKING BRILLIANT!!!"

Kicking the chair across the room, he managed to break a leg off in his anger. Even Ronny was shocked at this, staring from the broken chair in the corner to Thorn, chair, Thorn, chair, Thorn…

"What the fuck was that?"

Completely omitting her presence he continued on.

"You're so smart, and smooth…of course you know what's good for you, you've always know right…with the running away from home, running away from friends, away from family…away from sanity, with the disgusting clothes, unkempt hair, total sheltered life, with the decapitated heads in the dishwasher…with the blood stained birthday cake…everything you do…is perfect, you need NO HELP FROM ANYONE!!! CAUSE YOU'RE THE PICTURE PERFECT IDEA OF UTOPIA!!! AREN'T YOU!?!?!? AREN'T YOU?!?!?!"

His words flew past her head, totally unfazed by them she began to glare back, tired of his drama queen bull shit.

"Like you're foolproof…"

Was her defiant reply, he turned back to her, a small smile on his angry face…

"That's the thing…HERMIONE…I know I'm not....where as you, just don't seem to realize that you have a hell of a lot to learn…it hasn't clicked in your brain that…YOU'RE FUCKING RETARDED!! JUST LIKE THE REST OF US!!!"

"LEAVE ME THE HELL ALONE!!!"

She didn't know what was wrong with her and frankly she didn't care, running up the stairs to the apartment on top of Pyrrhic Pixie, she lunged onto her bed, burying her head into her pillow she began to scream like most teenagers would've.

"DAMN IT GRANGER!!!"

Thorn practically blew the door open, angry as anything, he waltzed into the bedroom, ripped of the sheets, and continued on with what he started.

"IF YOU WOULD GET YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOUR ASS FOR TWO SECONDS YOU WOULD'VE REALIZED THAT I AM TRYING TO HELP YOU!!! I KNOW YOU CAN'T DO THIS ON YOUR DAMNED OWN! YOU WOULDN'T BE STAYING HERE IN **MY** HOUSE IF THAT WASN'T THE DAMNED CASE!!!"

"WHEN IN THE HELL DID YOU BECOME MY FATHER HUH???!?! WHEN?!?! WHEN COULD YOU GROUND, PUNISH, HOLD ME BACK!?!?!"

"WHEN IN THE HELL DID YOU REACH MENOPAUSE!?!?!?"

"Funny Thorn! TOTALLY FALL INTO THE SEXIST POOL LIKE ALL THE OTHER **STRAIGHT** MEN!!!"

"YOU FUCKING WHORE!!!"

"AND WHERE THE HELL DID I GET IT FROM DADDY DEAREST?!?!? WOULD YOU LIKE TO TELL ME!?!?! OH! I DON'T KNOW MAYBE-"

Never in his life had Thorn been this angry, until today. Never in his life has Thorn hit a girl…until today. In nothing but shock, she fell to the floor, holding her cheek she gazed up at him in bewilderment. Tears coming back for what seemed like the 100th time that day.

She closed her eyes, trying to stop them. But it was useless, she was soon sobbing on the floor, with Thorn cradling her in his arms crying right along with her…

"I'm sorry Thorn…I'm so sorry, fix me! Please…god…fix me…"

Hermione continued to murmur meaningless apologies, amidst sniffles and convulsive weeping. Finally feeling the full effects of her total and complete failure, begging to be fixed. Begging to feel right again, a smile, laughter and friends were what she needed now. To let her know she didn't suck as much as the world was letting on.

To make her realize, that no matter how many foolish mistakes she made, no matter how many people she hurt, and no matter how unhappy she was with her life, she was still the same person…she didn't need to be fixed.

She couldn't be…

**Authors Note:** AHHHHH!!! I'M DONE!!! WOOHOO! BEEN SITTING IN THE SAME SPOT FOR THE PAST 4 HOURS!! LETS GOO! FOOD!! MMMHMMM!!! READ AND REVIEW!!! NO FLAMES!!! LOVE YOU!!! Gonna go jog around the neighborhood now!!!

****

****

**__**

****

****


	7. Chapter Six

**Untitled **

The flat was silent, all 3 boarders sat at the dining table in reticence. None of them knowing what to do. Thorn had called some sort of a meeting to announce 'business'. There was no movement apart from Ronny's bothersome tapping of her fingers on the table. Both Hermione and Thorn glared at the women who was currently quite ignorant of the innocent activities affects on her roommates.

"Ronny…darling…."

Thorn whispered. Ronny gazed at her old friend in attentive relief with a "Hm?"

"WOULD YOU PLEASE STOP WITH THE BLOODY TAPPING!"

She remained still for a moment, then calmly placed her hands in her lap, away from trouble.

"Ta"

Hermione couldn't help but laugh at this, and was presented with a glare from Thorn. She immediately averted her eyes to her feet, noting how smooth and soft they looked.

"Alright, now that you all seem to want to cooperate, I have an announcement"

Neither of the women moved, scared to react for fear of their friends wrath.

"I have been offered a job at Hogwarts."

He fiddled with his fingers for a moment, his tough and in control demeanor quickly deteriorating. Thorn nervously glanced from Linn to Ronny hoping for some sign on a positive reaction.

Hermione had somehow flown to the other side of the room, gripping on to the wall in horror. Ronny was still seated, blinking rapidly in shock.

"YOU WHAT!"

They both screeched, Thorn winced as the shrill sound attacked his ears, he began to try to explain.

"Well- you see- um…uh…see what had happened was…"

Both of their attitudes changed dramatically, as they huddled formidably over Thorns current cowering figure.

"Jesus ladies…is it getting PMS-y in here or what?"

He quickly got out of his seat, hoping his height advantage would quell their shock/anger/surprise just a bit. But to his misfortune, that was not the case.

Ronny was the first to start.

"I swear by all that is flamboyantly queer that if you tell me that both Trey and I have been added into your little FREAK contract I will sever your BALLS!"

He gulped, afraid to reply.

"Well…you see…you have really pretty hair?"

"OH MY GOD! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU!"

Hermiones anger at Thorn had been repositioned to Ronny.

"FREAK! Excuse me?"

"Oh! Linn you know very well what I meant!"

"No in fact I don't! I just happen to go to that FREAK school you so snidely look down on! So what if you all got jobs there? Lucky you? Do you know how many bastards dream of this! People would KILL to be able to work at such a fine institution!"

"I DON'T FUCKING CARE! I'm not fucking going slut!"

Seeing his chance Thorn had already bolted for his bedroom, hoping to find the note cards he had made in preparation for this sort of situation.

"Stay calm, breath and run stay calm breath and run"

He repeated to himself over and over again, trying his best to block out the screaming voices coming from the dining room.

"Oh bloody hell, it's a mad house"

Back in the dining room things hadn't gotten any better.

"OH! So you're not only insulting my school but myself as well! You bloody tamponed harlot!"

"You damn bitch! I'M NOT GOING TO A SCHOOL THAT PRODUCES LITTLE URCHINS LIKE YOU!"

"WELL I DON'T WANT TO HAVE TO BE TAUGHT BY A BIG FAT GARBAGE HOUND LIKE YOU!"

"Teaching? Who the fuck said anything about teaching?"

"Well what else could you do? Clean the bathrooms?"

Hermione laughed at the thought of her roommate cleaning after her. It was a very pleasant thought indeed.

"Shut the fuck up brat! Where the hell did that oversized Ken doll go! THORN YOU DIRTY ENEMA WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?"

The both looked around, and not finding the cause of all the trouble proceeded on a angry female rampage.

Hearing his name, Thorn panicked, he wasn't prepared for this, he should've waited until the last minute, they wouldn't have had enough time to be angry at him then.

"Why didn't I wait!"

He paced around the room, frantically searching for a hiding place. His eyes rested on the fireplace and without a sane thought dove in. Not even 2 seconds later Dumbledore obliviously apparated in the middle of the bedroom.

"I could've sworn he was here before…hmmm"

He looked around curiously, not hearing the sound of angry nymphs marching up the stairs.

"THORN YOU MOTHERFUCK-…WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU!"

Unfortunately for the Professor Ronny was the first one to make it. He chuckled softly, a sweet smile on his aged face.

"Ahh! You must be Ronny Wilkins, Hello. I am Professor Albus Dumbledore, I trust you have already been informed about your new position at Hogwarts. Thorn has told me quite a lot about you and I thought this would be perfect, I trust you'll take this position seriously and will fulfill it with much ease, after all designing uniforms should be snap. You'll only have a few students though, I'm afraid most of our students think themselves to refined for a sewing class…"

Ronny was beyond shocked, not only had she been offered a job at what seemed like the most boring institute in the world, she had accepted without her knowledge. Her stupor quickly transformed into anger, as she blocked the old man out and turned on her "Thorn-dar"

Mimicking the moves of a hungry predator she glided past Dumbledore and jumped on the bed, sniffing around like an animal.

Hermione stood in the threshold of the door, eyes wide with what seemed like fear and agitation.

Quite surprised by the Ronny's actions Dumbledore failed to notice Hermione standing at the door.

"Well I say there dear…what on earth are you doing?"

Ronny growled in response, getting closer to her prey as she neared the fireplace.

"Professor?"

Hermione squeaked, calling for Dumbledores attention. He gazed at her silently for a moment, and for the first time in what appeared to be hundreds of years he had no idea what to do.

And for this she was thankful.

"Professor, please don't say anything. For what little is left of my summer holidays, I am hoping will be the most peaceful and resting, after all I will need it right?"

She really didn't feel like delving into her ocean of emotions and traumatic experiences, all she wanted to do was forget them and live in peace. But she knew that her dream would probably never come true, thus producing an ominous view of her return to Hogwarts.

He understood, and remained quiet as he seemingly floated forward to embrace the child.

"RAWR!"

Ronny screeched, she latched onto Thorns shirt and ripped him out from his hiding place, he was covered in dirt and soot but she didn't mind. She was looking for blood.

"Look! Ronny! I can explain! He came to me, and offered and and…I didn't want to leave Linn alone, I mean look how bad she fared when she took that disastrous trip to Diagon, and that was only a day. What more a whole school year without your smart and loving…guidance?"

She hissed at the terrified man, a look of pure anger on her face.

"I'm sorry! I am! But if he had come to you individually you would've accepted, no matter how much you argue with the girl you still try and protect her. And besides, I've already talked to Trey about it. And he even suggested you two saving money and bunking together, even though it's all expenses paid…he insisted. And…uh…it's one bed?"

"He did?"

Once again showing her amazingly bipolar brain, she dropped Thorn to the floor and began to blush. Thorn let out a sigh of relief then checked to see if he had pissed himself. Hoping to save more time before she got angry again he piped.

"He's coming around 4 you know? Oh and would you look at that it's 3:45, he'll be here in any minute"

Just as he predicted she rushed of into her room, he picked himself of the floor and attempted to wipe the residue of off his face.

Dumbledore laughed at the poor man, and offered him his handkerchief.

Thorn gladly took it, skeptically looking over Hermione in worry. She smiled at his motherly maneuver and shook her head as if to say there was no need to worry.

"I have a had time believing that."

He replied in a whisper.

Dumbledore patted Thorn on the shoulder and said.

"Well looks like the news has been spread, and I'm sure you know that all Professors must be at Hogwarts 2 days before the students arrive? Hermione will be coming along with you I suppose. Congratulations Thorn, you have just become Hogwarts newest Professor of the new named class that is required for graduation 'Muggle Studies". I'll be seeing you seen then. Please take good care of the girl, I wouldn't expect you to falter in your good parenting now after all, I wouldn't be giving you this job if I didn't trust you. Goodbye."

Dumbledore then disappeared leaving a white flurry of smoke in his wake. Hermione practically tackled Thorn, gripping onto him for dear life. For a minute he thought she was crying and had already switched into comfort mode. But he became at ease again when he felt her soft laughter vibrate through his chest. She looked up at him with a wide smile, a total opposite reaction to the whole ordeal then he had expected.

"You're filthy"

She claimed with a smile, he laughed at her and continued to wipe his face.

"Thank you Thorn."

She stepped back, clasped her hands behind her back and looked up at him with endearing eyes.

"Thank you so much…I don't know if I could've made it without you, I just don't know what I would've done!"

The tears started again, he laughed at her silly melodramatics, patting her on the back in comfort.

"Don't be foolish, the only reason he gave us all jobs was because he knew we would've very well snuck onto the train and followed you. You honestly don't think I'm about to leave my beautiful creation in some dark, dingy and totally unfashionable bachelors pad do you? You must be insane my dear. You cost far to much for that."

She smiled even wider, trying not to feel stupid as she wiped her futile tears with the hem of her dress.

He stepped back in aversion, watching as she wiped off her running mascara on a 245 pound white Chanel dress. Mouth dropping to the floor and practically spitting venom he shrieked.

"OH MY GOD YOU **BITCH**!"


	8. Chapter Six Pt 2

1**Untitled Part Two**

**"Ronny my goodness, what in the hell is taking you so long? Are you growing some bloody boobs?" **

**Thorn called upstairs, he waited for a little while, then finally gave up and retreated back into the living room.**

**Trey showed up at 4:00 on the dot, sporting a new outfit, new hair cut (much to Thorns dismay) and freshly cut sunflowers. And it was now 7:00, he was sitting downstairs on the coach** **adjacent to Hermione, who had a sly and knowing look on her face. Ruffling his hair, he let out a long sigh fueled with embarrassment. **

"**Go on, laugh. I know you want to"**

**And she did, by the time Thorn had made it back she was on the floor clutching to her abdomen in pain. He looked from Trey to Linn in questioning, but Trey just dismissed him with a vengeful look. Seeing this Thorn couldn't help but chuckle at his obviously uncomfortable brother. He stepped over Linn and took her place on the arm chair. **

"**So . . . where are you taking her?"**

**Trey looked up at his older sibling in alarm.**

"**Taking her? What are you talking about? You invited me over for dinner. And I can explain the flowers, they're for . . . the house"**

**Thorn let out a belch of laughter, and threw his head back in merriment. **

"**Trey, darling, how long have I known you? Yes, that's right. Your whole life, and that includes the nine months of floating around in fluids. I mean after all you can't insure a child's good sense of fashion unless you school them early . . . Oh I remember the days. Oh look at me ! You have me digressing, you filthy tramp. Haha, sweetling where are you taking her?** **I know you have something planned. You always did when it came to our dearest Ronny. I mean for Christ's sake I'm gay, how many more flowers could I need? Linn, darling would you please get off the floor, you do have a rather attractive bum but I don't want to spend the rest of the night looking at it"**

**Hermione complied, and settled herself on the arm of the chair. **

"**That's a good girl, now as I was saying. Trey, my beloved . . . it's quite obvious you want to bang the girl's brain out"**

"**Thorn you don't know anything"**

**Thorn feigned hurt for a moment, then merely laughed the comment off. **

"**Fine, I may not know anything, but you certainly know I'm right. Don't you love?"**

**Muscles tight, and jaw locked, Trey had a hard time finding a response. He didn't know what to do, he tried his damn best not to be to obvious about his lingering feelings for Ronny, and he tried his best to not look at her like that or look at her at all. For a year now he had been forcing himself to attempt at getting over the girl. Because he knew that his residual feelings wouldn't fair well with the newly turned lesbian. After all, the only reason they weren't together was because of his stupidity and rather large phallus. **

**His brother knew all of this, if not even more. There was nothing more he could do. **

**But stop. **

**He stood up, standing tall above the two, and with a solemn nod he quickly exited the large flat. Throwing the flowers on the couch. Thorn looked after his dejected brother with a serious demeanor, worry written all over his face. He looked back to the forgotten Sunflowers that lay on the couch, and let out a long sigh resting back on the armchair. **

"**Why can he never get a right?"**

**He whispered, trying to block the headache that was fast approaching. **

"**Where is he?"**

**Ronny stood in the doorway, looking as pretty as a picture. She wore an original, a dress Thorn had made her a long time ago. It was a sleeveless white lace mini dress, which accentuated her curves and showed off her long legs. **

"**Where is he!"**

**She looked around the room for a moment, then met with Thorns grave eyes. A surge of panic evading her senses. **

"**No, where is he?"**

**Immediately sensing drama, Linn quietly escaped to the kitchen, knowing that what was about to take place was very well none of her business.**

"**I wasn't here at the beginning of it, so what right do I have to interject now?"**

**She muttered to herself as she poured herself some tea. Sipping the hot drink, she perched herself on the counter and placed 'Hogwarts History' in her lap. **

_Bad habits never die I see._

_**Oh bugger off.**_

_So are you prepared for this?_

_**Oh give me a bloody break, school doesn't start until September, I still have a couple of weeks to go. And besides, I have the whole support team coming with me. There's no need for a dramatic thing like you.**_

_Fine._

**A slab of paranoia invaded her mind. She wasn't used to 'The Voice' giving up so quickly. **

"**Oh well, might as well live it up while it lasts."**

**---**

"**Thorn? Please tell me he's here."**

**Ronny was practically begging for some sign of reassurance from the seated man, and when seeing none, her knees buckled out from underneath her and she fell to the floor with an uncommon sob. Thorn was immediately by her side. She held onto him in desperation, wailing into his dress. **

"**Where is he?"**

"**He's gone sweetheart."**

**She cried even louder, feeling the sudden pang of rejection. Tonight was supposed to be a new start, he had called her the night before and asked her out to dinner, apologizing for his irrational behavior at the Hotel, all the while admonishing her for her successful attempt at seduction. They had continued on to talk for at least three hours after that. Reminiscing about old times, and planning the next night. **

**All her hope, and wishes crumbled down in her face as the cold realization crept up her spine.**

"**He doesn't really want me"**

"**No, no, shush. Honey, look at me."**

**He tilted her head up with his manicured fingers, a stern look on his face. **

"**He didn't leave because of you, I want you to know that. It has never been because of you. You are absolute perfection to him Ronny. You're a jewel. He's just afraid he'll mess up again. Won't even give himself the chance. I know for a fact he'd kill himself if he ever even thought about repeating his actions two years ago. Oh my angel, dry those terrible tears. You didn't waste a good two hours working on that fantastic make up!"**

**He stood up, pulling her up with him. **

"**Put on a coat darling. We're going on a mission. Linn We're going out to party, and you're coming along" **

**Linn emerged from the kitchen with a cup of tea and an inquisitive look on her face. He grabbed both of the girls and darted upstairs screaming.**

"**VOGUE TIME"**

**---**

**Hermione, being Hermione and underage had never been to a nightclub before, and didn't think tonight would make much of a difference, for one. **

**She was only 16. **

**But every time she asked Thorn about this he just laughed and said. **

"**It doesn't matter how old you are my pet as long as you're with me you'll get in with no problem"**

**His long black hair was pulled back into jagged and messy pigtails, adding a touch of Porn Star to his already scandalous outfit. **

**Bright pink stilettos, a white mini-mini-mini skirt, and a blue corset. He proudly fiddled with his simulated cleavage which he claimed was 'all the rage here in Soho'. He had also dressed Hermione to her substantial dismay. In only 30 minutes, he had managed to curl her hair into a ball of silk and sew a dress for her.**

_Will wonders never cease?_

**It was a sleeveless short black mini dress, much like Ronny's (who had stayed completely silent through Thorns proud, confidant and wonderfully queer rampage) with nothing but two pieces of white chiffon to hold it up. She difficulty wobbled behind Thorn as her own shoes attempted to murder her. **

"**Thorn are you sure about these shoes? I'm not sure how I feel about being 6 ft tall."**

**The trio stopped at a traffic light, waiting for the light to turn red so they could safely pass. Thorn laughed at Linn's comment and claimed. **

"**Darling remember my little saying? The longer the legs-"**

"**The faster the erection . . . "**

**She sighed, leaning onto to the traffic light for a quick rest from the 5 inch heels. As soon as the light turned red they were off, Thorn strutted his stuff down the zebra crossing as if it were a runway, teasing his fake Versache coat as if he were modeling. **

"**There it is, there's my home . . . "**

**The first thing Hermione saw were lights, lots and lots of lights. All different colors and all neon, they surrounded a huge neon sign that said in proud intense letters 'FAIRY'. **

**The line was outrageous, and Hermione immediately paled as she looked on at the onslaught of people trying to get in. **

"**Thorn. We'll never make it in there. Have you seen the line?"**

"**Oh I've seen it darling, isn't it sexy?"**

**She decided to keep her worries to herself from then on, Thorn appeared to be high and Ronny was just depressed. **

_**I'll just have to take things as they come, as they come. I can do this, as they come. No freaking out, all I have to do is trust Thorn. Trust . . . trust . . . oh my god is that a dinosaur?**_

**Hermione's thought immediately became centered on what seeming like an intimidating robotic dinosaur. It only reached about 3 ft, but the way it swung that bat around menacingly you knew not to go near it. **

**And much to her chagrin they were heading straight toward it. **

"**Oh Gregory"**

**Thorn cooed, the midget dinosaur turned around with a snarl then almost immediately followed it with a squeal.**

"**THORN! Oh! You look amazing ! You haven't been here in weeks ! Where the hell have you been ! Christ we all missed you ! Especially Rolando !" **

**Hermione peeked from Thorns side, looking at what appeared to be a midget woman in a dinosaur suit. Thorn and the female (at least what she hoped was a female) chatted for a little while before the woman pushed through the crowds and led them through the front door. The doorman was to be expected, a big bulky man with shades and silver knuckles on. **

"**Hello Emsy"**

**Thorn patted him on the shoulder as he walked by and his greeting was replied with a cheerful grunt as the triplet disappeared through the doors. **

**Hermione felt the cold air rushing toward her as soon as the doors were closed, the music vibrated everything around her as the heavy bass line of the trance music evaded her ear drums. She mimicked Thorn who appeared to be having the time of his life already and took of her coat. **

"**Ronny?"**

**Ronny, looked up at Thorn with a dispirited smile.**

"**Go find him"**

**He grabbed onto Linn's hand and rushed down the stairs, and practically dived into the throng of wild dancers. **

"**Honey! Welcome to paradise" **

**Thorn gripped onto her hand warmly, trying to alleviate what fear he could from the poor girl. **

**Hermione looked around her wide eyed, both men, women and drag queens danced feverishly to the beat of the music as strobe lights and balloons invaded every crevice on the club. Thorn led Linn to the bar, head bobbing to the music he shouted out to the bartender.**

"**Oh Kylie! Give me a marvelously gay Cosmopolitan and this child a Virgin Margarita!" **

**Kylie nodded and prepared the drinks, his young and thin hips moving to the music. Thorn kept his eyes to the mans ass, a dreamy smile set on his face. He gave the boy a lusty look as he served the drink gulping it down in one swift motion, he then dragged Hermione of to the nearest vacant booth. **

"**Darling! LOOK! You are in Utopia! Every gay man, fashion fopa, hip know it all, trendy social climbers, and rich billionaires can be found here! In the haven of Fairy ! Oh my sweet, isn't it fantastic! Can you smell the SEX!" **

**Her eyes were still glued to the dance floor, as she watched as what seemed like thousands of both men and women, moved in unison to the music. **

**Seeing where her eyes were connected, Thorn smiled and said. **

"**Wanna dance?"**

**---**

**First she was ditched by her would be boyfriend, and then by her self-proclaimed gay guru and his adverse sidekick. Ronny had no where else to turn but to alcohol. **

"**I suppose I could've followed Thorns advice, and gone looking for Trey, I mean he does work here after all. But that would be a disaster, he doesn't love me . . . little fucker" **

**She waltzed up to the bar and demanded a Vodka, Kylie having known her a good four years knew better than to argue. She chugged down the drink in a second, and sat down at the bar stool. Eyes roaming the night club. **

**Kylie peered at her as he served another customer, she looked fabulous as always. Hair, face and oh god that body. He licked his lips as he noted that her dress was practically see through. **

"**Kylie?"**

**She called out, her back was faced toward him as she scanned the crowds. **

"**Yes?"**

**He attentively answered, eyes still roaming. **

"**Would you do me?"**

**He practically choked on air, looking at her as if she was crazy. **

"**Would you Kylie?"**

**She swung around, obviously getting drunk. Taking his hand, she placed it on her chest. **

"**Would you enjoy it Kylie?"**

**He groaned as she moved his hand to her chest, then lower. **

"**I break in five minutes"**

**He whispered, hardly believing that he had gotten such a lucky chance. **

"**See you in the back then"**

**She smirked then pranced off, knowing fully well that his eyes were fixed on her ass. Ronny walked through the dance floor with a smirk on her face. Kylie really wasn't what she wanted but he would have to do. **

**She slipped into the supply room unobtrusively, and leaned against the wall. Surveying the cracked ceiling as she began to rethink her thoughts.**

"**Ok, so I'm drunk, horny and desperate. Can I really find any other reason to not do this man? I mean he's perfectly clean, I've known him forever and I need a quick self-esteem fuck. That doesn't make me a bad person does it?"**

**Memories of Trey began to invade her mind, she thought of him constantly. No matter what she was doing, it wasn't like she could help it, she was or is in love with him. **

"**And it won't go away, I don't even think I want it to"**

**She couldn't understand him though, there where millions of times where he came so close to making everything perfect again, but then he'd just run away, just like tonight. And Thorn never gave her any information. He just sat there and cradled her in his arms trying to comfort, and it's not like she wasn't grateful for the Queens help. **

**She just needed a little more of it. **

**She stood up straight with purpose when she heard the door knob turn. **

**It was now or never. **

**---**

**Hermione soon loosened up as soon as she hit the dance floor, swinging with joy. She and Thorn tangoed across the floor effortlessly. Not minding the throng of people, they had to push through. Thorn continued to smile, also having the time of his life. **

"**Oh darling! I haven't been here in what seems like years!"**

**She laughed at his exaggeration as they glided across the floor. **

"**You know Linn, they are some amazing sexy straight men out here . . . "**

"**Thorn, would you please desist!"**

**She shouted over the blaring speakers, he laughed and replied. **

"**You're gonna get laid and you're gonna like it honey! It's the way of the world!"**

"**Excuse me?"**

**Someone tapped on Thorns shoulder, calling for his attention. In compliance Thorn turned around to meet the tear stained eyes of his brother. **

**Both stopped dancing, and stared at Trey in iron shock. **

"**We have a table."**

**Thorn quickly moved off of the dance floor and the two followed him.**

**Hermione was lost once again, and tried to piece the bits together when they sat down at the booth. She was in the middle of the two brothers and still had no idea what was going on. **

**They began to talk, and as she looked from one sibling to the other, the topic of conversation looked fairly serious. **

**Tuning her attention elsewhere she noted that the barman was gone and had been replaced by a girl/man.**

_**Oh, she's pretty. **_

**Not taking any notice of his charges wandering attention, Thorn glared seriously at his younger brother, who could do nothing but look at his own hands he had placed in his lap. **

"**Why did you leave?"**

**He had made the first move, and now waited impatiently for a response. **

"**Because, it wouldn't have worked out."**

**Slamming the table in frustration Thorn began his speech. **

"**Trey, I have tried my damned hardest to stay out of this one. I have enough drama with Linn on my plate, I need nor want to be cleaning up after all of your silly mistakes. She was absolutely heartbroken when she came down the stairs and you weren't there, and she looked fabulous to. That dress I made her was brilliant . . . "**

"**It looked even better on the floor . . . "**

"**What?"**

"**She's in the supply room, with Kylie."**

"**WHAAAAAAAAAAAT! THAT TWO-TIMING HUSSY! Linn! I will be right back!"**

**He marched off with a malicious aura, leaving Trey and Linn in his wake. Trying to ease the tensions Linn attempted at communication. **

"**So . . . what job at you getting at Hogwarts?" **

**Trey looked up at her as if she had just noticed her presence, his eyes looking her up and down. Making Linn feel all the more uncomfortable. He was drunk, it was so obvious, but she hoped that drunk Trey would be as obsessed with Ronny, as drunk Ronny was with him.**

**He sighed and stared off in the opposite direction. **

"**I'll be helping Thorn. I'll be teaching the normal stuff. He's decided to start Sex-Ed. I don't really know how well that would fare with the old man. But you can't argue with a flaming queer like Thorn now can you?"**

**He laughed at his own joke, running his hands through his hair as if to massage the pain away. **

"**Haha . . . yeah . . . "**

**Not knowing what else to do or say, Linn remained quiet. Her fingers interlaced with the chiffon of her dress. **

"**So what's this school like?"**

**He asked, like he was taking an actual interest in it. **

"**It's a gigantic castle, with millions of rooms and chambers and ever dungeons. It's on an island, surrounded by is a equally monstrous lake with all sorts of things in it. Animals like Giant 'magical' octopuses, and ferocious sharks that aren't so ferocious when you get close enough. There's just so much at Hogwarts, I don't think I could explain it very well." **

"**I understand, that Professor guy showed me pictures, or what looked like pictures. Ya see, normal pictures don't move. Had me all tripped out there"**

**She laughed at his jokes, glad that he hadn't tried to jump her yet. **

"**Don't worry Linn. I'm not looking to get laid tonight. I really am sorry for last time though. A bit to many shots of vodka."**

**He laid back, and put his head in her lap, seeming to fall asleep. She stayed frigid for a moment, then noted that he actually had fallen asleep she became at ease again. Softly wiping away his dried tears with her dress. **

**She had never seen a man cry before.**

**And she thought it was the saddest thing she had ever seen. **

**---**

**Thorn barged into the supply room without restraint, an odious snarl on his face. Ronny had been pushed up against the wall, she was bare naked and loving it. And Kylie wasn't holding anything back, four years of sexual yearning had been building up just for this occasion. Neither of them noticed the drag queen who seemed to be on fire standing at the doorway. **

"**YOU BLOODY CUNT!" **

**He howled, feeling anger more than anything. Kylie promptly dropped Ronny to the floor, grabbed his clothes and ran. His first three months at Fairy had taught him a lot about the infamous Queen of the Queers, he had seen many a bitch fits, and got caught in the cross fire of all of them. And didn't really feel the need to go through one more. **

**He bolted with a quick apology and a bare bum, leaving Ronny alone in the guilty corner. She sighed out the world and picked up her dress, managing to put it back on before Thorn could do anymore. It was dismally crumpled, decorated with a large black smudge on the front. **

"**Probably where he pushed me up against the wall" **

**She muttered, surveying the damage. **

"**Ronny."**

**Thorn stood tall and arrogant in front of her, arms crossed in a prissy huff. She rolled her eyes at the man, and attempted to clean up her clearly ruined dress.**

"**Ronny, you straight ding bat. Look at me!"**

**She continued to ignore him, looking around the room for her lost right heel. **

"**God damn it! He saw you! If you were going to be a right bitch and get laid by someone else could you at least have done it somewhere private?" **

**She froze in her tracks, not wanting to look up at her disappointed friend. **

"**He saw me?"**

"**Yes you little fuck-face he saw you! And you know how he's feeling right now? The same way you felt a couple of hours ago . . . I'm tired of this. You're both incompetent little fools! And I am tired of being in the middle. I refuse to clean up after you! FIX THIS BITCH YOURSELF!"**

**---**

"**Are we ready?"**

**That night had been chaotic, Trey left soon after Thorn had marched off, claiming he was off to bed, and after Thorn came back from wherever he had gone off to, and he wasn't in the mood for communication. They left soon after that, with Thorn claiming that he simply wasn't in the mood for partying. And to Hermione, in adult language that meant he was getting old, but it sure as hell didn't look like it. Hermione hadn't heard from either Ronny or Trey for a good week, and Thorn of course wasn't giving up any info, for the first time since she had known him it seemed like a. he didn't really care and b. he really didn't know. **

**Thorn quietly applied his make-up in the bathroom mirror, choosing to ignore his charges question. They were off to Diagon again, and it was all Linn's idea. She stood in the middle of the doorway, patiently waiting for her assumed parent to finish up. For the first time in what seemed like years, she had chosen the outfit herself, not feeling up to Thorns commands in the early hours of the morning. It was 'The Pregnant Dress', it was black, with simple Japanese embroidery along the hem line. The only part of his body it stuck to was her chest, and she appreciated the freedom it gave her with the rest of her limbs. **

"**Done"**

**Thorn declared with a triumphant smirk. **

"**You look like a slut"**

**He declared, still smiling at the girl. She glared at him for a moment, but said nothing as she picked up her jacket and walked out the door. **

"**But a very pretty one"**

**He added as they made their way down the stairs. Hermione preferred to take the stairs to the elevator much to Thorns dismay.**

"**Oh come off it Thorn! You'll thank me for the exercise"**

**He scoffed at her and replied.**

"**Bitch that's what the sex is for" **

**She laughed as they got down to the lobby and progressed onto the cold street. **

"**Lead the way darling"**

**He said, lifting up the collar of his coat to protect his ears.**

"**It's an usually cold day isn't it? Sometimes I wished I lived in America, where summer is actually sunny."**

**Hermione pronounced as she mimicked his maneuvers. **

"**And the men are actually m-e-n. Oh I was one of the lucky few to be blessed with an American penis. Christ I don't know what I'd do with a 4 inch, and all this rubbish the British are coming up with about gay men liking the smaller penis. Oh please! Just trying to save face, if I did have a small British prick (which I don't) I'd be proud AND patriotic. And probably straight..."**

**He continued to go on about his insane theories, not noticing Linns obvious lack on interest. She had learnt long ago about Thorn and his talks, just like his prudish fits, they seemed to go on forever. She looked back at the talking man, noting his lack of feminine qualities. **

"**Left your breasts at home?"**

"**Oh! How rude of you to interrupt, my babies are only for the night sweetie. Think of them as night predators...looking for a good fuck"**

"**You've been wearing them all week Thorn, everywhere!"**

"**I was trying them out darling..."**

"**Oh and the butcher was to? That poor man...I can't believe you made him feel your imaginary chest up..."**

"**Oh don't be such a prune, he enjoyed it. My gay-dar goes off every time I'm around that tub of butter, he wants my sexy body and I know that for a fact." **

**She rolled her eyes at him and said. **

"**Everyone wants your body don't they? Including the inanimate objects." **

"**Ohhh, not only is she a prodigy, but she can spit out venom at will. Well aren't you a right Wonder Woman? Ops, looks like you're missing a few CUPS!"**

**He impromptely grabbed her chest, giving her right breast a good squeeze before he took off. She dashed after him like a mad woman screaming. **

"**YOU WISHED YOU HAD A PAIR OF THESE!"**

**He laughed like a hyena and screamed back.**

"**OH BUT I DO DEAREST! THEY'RE NICE AND ROUND AND MUCH FIRMER!" **

**Authors Note: Hogwarts and the trip to Diagon will be in the next chapter. Thank you all very much. For staying with me for such a long time. I really do appreciate it. **


	9. Chapter Seven

Brand New Colony

Hermione sat at the foot of her Queen size bed, eyes wide with horror as she gazed at the

shopping bags Thorn had accumulated over their 30 minute quickie at Diagon. Thorn had been kind to her and didn't linger in any of the stores, instead he waltzed in, pockets full of cash and hurriedly ordered around all the wizards. Smiling at what he liked and sneering at what he thought was distasteful. The wizard clerks practically kissed his feet, even Hermione was surprised at the amount of money Thorn decided to exchange at Gringotts. She'd never spent five thousand pounds in one sitting before and all she really needed was a new Uniform. The man was carelessly dropping 100's of coins all over the floor for no reason, and hadn't even bothered to pick them up.

"What a diva . . . "

She breathed out in a whisper. A tress of her black hair fell in her face, somewhat hindering her vision. She didn't bother with it though, she had better things to obsess about.

**How on earth will I pay him back?**

She looked around the room in dismay, with a stern frown on her pretty features. She stood up and placed her small hands on her hips, rubbing the silk of her summer dress. She slipped off her flats, and wiggled her toes, looking down at them with a small smile. Memories flitted through her brain of her mother and her own unusual habits. A brief picture of her mothers plain face appeared before Hermione, setting the frown in even deeper. Her mother was smiling at her, eyes squinting unflatteringly as she ran to embrace her daughter. Hermione could almost feel her short arms incase her in an overdrawn demonstration of affection.

She threw her head back and opened her eyes, glaring up at the ceiling in consternation.

**What on earth was that?**

She scrutinized every crack and crevice she saw, trying to forget all the visions she thought she had forgotten.

"Linn?"

She bounced back into reality as quickly as she had left it, tearing her gaze from the roof she gave her guardian a warm smile . He gave her an odd look, worry momentarily flashing in his eyes as he walked toward her.

"You ok?"

He asked, looking through one of the bags idly. She nodded, then playfully poked him in the side. Letting out a small giggle when he shrieked and jumped back. Thorn was horribly ticklish, and she of course knew where. It served as a very useful weapon when she needed it.

Ignoring her offensive action he grabbed about five out of the million bags and threw them on the bed with a grunt. Sighing, he let out.

"I can't believe we have to leave tomorrow"

After they had come back from the shopping trip, they were greeted by an owl who was trying desperately to break into the apartment. Thorn was immediately alarmed and just about ran off when the owl came at them. But Hermione had already noticed the professional Hogwarts tag hanging off of one of its talons and held at her hand in expectation. It did its job and delivered the letter, and flew off without a glance back.

The letter was from Dumbledore, and it told them to pack their things early, he had moved their arrival dates to the next day. Thorn was not happy, and spent a good hour on the phone throwing a fit while Hermione was left alone to lug the bags upstairs one by one.

She remained quiet and began to wiggle her toes again, relishing the feel of them on the soft carpet.

**I wish it was grass...**

Thorn sighed and walked over to the night stand, picking up the cordless black phone he dialed Ronny's number. He sat on the bed, patiently waiting for the answering machine, he didn't expect her to pick up. After the countless days spent trying to locate his friend and brother he had given up and resorted to texting/emails/and forwarded messages.

"Hello?"

A voice crackled over the phone. He screeched in surprise, nearly dropping it, but soon gained his composure and screamed.

"RONNY? WHERE THE BLOODY HELL HAVE YOU BEEN?"

Hermione looked up at the shocked man with eyes wide. She sprawled across the bed and perched next to Thorn, excitement creeping up her spine, her eyes sparkled with excitement. . Thorn quickly looked over at her, listening to the phone intently.

"You what?"

He asked carefully, wrapping his fingers around Hermione's hair, trying his best not to shout. She leaned in closer, and placed her small head on his shoulder, her large eyes closing in peace. The thought that she had to be at Hogwarts the next day didn't seem to faze her at all. After all the fuss, and tears she had created over the whole situation, it appeared as if the young girl didn't even care.

"So you are coming back right?"

Hermione looked up at her Idol with a dreamy look on her face, she had been getting more and more starry eyed as of late and quite frankly it was worrying him. They were so much closer to her reality, and at any other time Hermione would be frantic, crying, screaming, shaking in fear. But that wasn't the case. After the letter had arrived, she glided with ease through the hallways with a whimsical smile and dazed eyes, singing silly songs with absolutely nothing on her mind.

Thorn wasn't used to this. He wasn't used to things suddenly becoming perfect. He had become well adapted to the hard work and effort he had to put into to everything to make things all right. An overnight fix would never satisfy. It was far too good to be true. He peered down at the day dreaming doll resting on his shoulder and thought.

_We'll just have to wait until tomorrow. _

"Honey, we're leaving tomorrow . . . I know I know, short notice. But of course you'd would be a tad bit more prepared if you, oh I don't know, decided to come home?...Yes, I've got everything we need, we went shopping this morning . . . Blah, blah, have you heard from my brother lately?...Oh. Right . . . A Hotel?...Which one?...Hilton? Classy. "

A broad smile beamed off of his face, it was just one good thing after another. He nudged Hermione back into reality with a hard jab in the ribs. She jumped up in surprise, hand quickly massaging her side, she was sure a bruise would make itself known. She scowled at Thorn, her other hand combing her long hair in an attempt to ease the sudden frustration.

"What?"

She asked in annoyance, blowing a tress off her nose. He laughed and shook his head, turning the other way as the phone molded into his cheek bone. She rolled her eyes and got off the bed, stepping over the bags she exited the room and headed off to the kitchen. She pulled out a kettle when she arrived at her destination and began to make herself some tea.

"I do believe it'll be French Vanilla today"

She inhaled the wonderful scent as she opened the tea box, sighing as she closed her eyes and took all of it in.

"Mmm . . . "

---

Thorn put the phone down with a flattering giggle.

"Well isn't that lovely!"

He surveyed the room with a smile, noting the absence of his little darling. Sighing he stretched his arms out and fell back on the king-sized bed, relishing the feel of expensive linen as he flailed about carelessly.

Hermione carefully made her way up the stairs, two hot cups of French Vanilla tea practically jumping out of her small hands.

Thorn jumped up and quickly grabbed a cup from her, sipping it in delight. He offered a warm smile in thanks. She sat down in the small arm chair next to the varnished antique dresser and tasted her own cup.

"Trey and Ronny are currently enjoying a nice continental brunch at the Hilton Hotel."

She raised her eyebrows in surprise and asked.

"Together?"

He laughed and put his cup down on the bed side table, fidgeting like a 4-year-old with an exciting story to tell. His hair fell out of his careless bun and fell in his face, and he quickly pulled it back.

"Why of course dear! Isn't it wonderful? They've been shagging straight since Wednesday!"

Hermione blushed at the vivid image and shamefully continued to drink her tea.

He continued to blabber on in excitement, taking two large suitcases from underneath the bed, he opened them up and began to pack.

He was still talking when Hermione finally finished her tea and got up to help. She "Mmm"-ed and "Uh-huh"-ed her way through all of the bags.

The clock was just striking seven as they finished, three huge suitcases covered the bed and six decorated the floor, leaving no room for a young girl to lie down.

"Fancy some Chinese? With been at this all day, I think we deserve a nice greasy treat"

She nodded happily, plopping herself on the nearest designer bag, watching his swift legs as they departed, a pang of annoyance shot through her.

**Bastard just has to show of those long ass legs...**

She looked up hopelessly at the bed, and seeing no available spot, she had no choice but to settle for the floor. Hermione was soon uncomfortably asleep, and was long gone when Thorn came back. He chuckled at the little girl, took a fur blanket out of the cupboard and spilled it over her.

"Silly child could've used the guest room"

He laughed again and went back down the stairs. Settling on the couch, he snuggled into the sheer silk pillows and began to consume his Chow Mein Noodle dish.

"So tomorrow is the day . . . "

He sighed, remembering all the times Hermione had freaked at the thought of going back to school, but now she seemed perfectly fine, she was basically acting like tomorrow would be any other day.

But it wasn't any other day, it was a big step for all of them. Bigger for Hermione of course, but it was still pretty damned intimidating to Thorn. Looking around the apartment, he realized that this would basically be the last time he'd see his home until Christmas.

He'd be thrown into another world, all for a girl he hadn't even known for 4 months.

But it was worth it, he decided. Anything for his darling.

"Ronny and Trey may not see it that way . . . "

All he could do was wait until tomorrow for the results.

"Christ it's like Doomsday . . . "

---

Her hands were beautiful.

She lifted them up toward the sunlight, smiling at the shadows from the illumination. It looked like she was reaching out toward the sun, she smiled at the thought and put her hands down, resting them both on her stomach. She kicked off the blanket and looked up at the window. Savoring the warmth of the sun on her pretty face.

Sitting up for a moment, she took in her surroundings. Noting the large bags were gone and the room was practically empty. The only thing out of place was a pale blue cotton dress on the bed accompanied by a pair of white flats. She smiled at the simplicity.

Of course Thorn wouldn't go overboard on her big day.

She picked up the dress and held it up against her, noting the extremely short length and the intricate embroidery lining its chest.. She didn't complain though, at least he didn't have her dressed up like the Mad Hatter again.

She carefully put the dress back in place, and drifted off into the bathroom.

---

He looked up at the ceiling in apprehension, he had heard her movements and perceived the sound of pipes as she got into the shower. Ronny and Trey sat opposite of him, hands intertwined as the followed his gaze. All three of them were dressed and ready, they're bags in a cab waiting patiently in the street.

Thorn returned his eyes to his friends and sighed, gulping down the rest of his cold coffee.

"No sign of insanity so far . . . "

Ronny whispered, almost as agitated as her friend.

"She can do this . . . "

Thorn claimed with confidence that quickly crumbled when he noticed the rest of his coffee was gone. Trey grabbed the cup before Thorn could get up to get more.

"You've had nine cups so far Thorn"

"I need to make it an even number Trey, and I do have other mugs"

Trey immediately stood up in a motion to threaten his own brother who only turned around in response.

"I'm pretty sure you've had enough Thorn"

Trey stated calmly, placing the mug on the table next to Ronny. Ronny looked up at the two men with a bored sigh.

"Oh come off it the both of you, sit down and act civilly"

Thorn scoffed at these words but sat down at her bidding.

"Isn't that righteous coming from you?"

"Don't take out your nervousness on me, we have better things to worry about don't we?"

Thorn looked up to the ceiling once more and nodded.

"And isn't it just horrid..."

---

Hermione stood at the threshold of the kitchen door, a calm smile on her face as she gazed upon her older roommates. They all had her back towards her and all had their necks craned upwards.

"I'm ready"

She practically sang, hands gripping a small white backpack that she had obviously over packed with books. She fiddled with it for a moment, taking out at least 4 of the novels. Then looked back up at her audience with a triumphant smile.

All head snapped around in her direction, immediate fear on all of their faces. She mistook their obvious fright for disgust and blushed becomingly.

"What? Is the dress not alright?"

Thorn seeing a shining opening, claimed.

"No! It's horrendous, come along. I'll find you a new one. You'll meet us downstairs won't you Trey? Ronny?"

The nodded, cautiously shuffling out of the flat.

Thorn turned back to her and smiled.

"Well come along then, let's go find something more becoming"

He hurried her upstairs, and rushed for the closet.

She sat at the foot of the bed and peered over at him, quietly wondering what was causing him so much agitation, she voiced her thoughts and asked.

"Thorn? Is something wrong?"

He screeched, clutching at his heart he replied.

"Oh no...nothing dear..."

She seemed satisfied with this answer and kept quiet.

"Oh! I've changed my mind, the dress looks fantastic...as everything does on you"

He sat down next to her with a warm smile and began to play with her hair.

"Shouldn't we be getting downstairs then?"

She asked with a confused look on her delicate face.

He forced a laugh and replied excitedly.

"Oh no...I just want to sit here a bit and...talk"

"Talk?"

"Yes darling, I feel like we haven't chatted enough lately, a safe and secure family communicates and conveys their feelings often you know. I saw that on Teli yesterday and thought 'Oh what a wonderful idea'...don't you think?"

"Thorn, what's wrong?"

"Nothing, nothing...just wondering darling, is there anything you want to talk to me about? Anything important? That you may need to get out before we arrive at Hogwarts? Any worries? Thoughts? Run away ideas?"

She looked a bit disoriented by his strange questions and replied.

"No Thorn, I think we've covered everything..."

He looked unbelievably disappointed and stood up with a frown, he didn't know what to expect now, here she was completely calm. She seemed almost normal. Things were just going a bit to easily for him.

**Maybe it's a robot...**

"Right then, we're off"

---

The taxi was uncommonly silent, and Hermione felt the blood rush to her face as she noted that all eyes were on her.

She remained silent, and continued to focus on the happening outside, trying her best not to notice her companions strange behavior.

**_They're waiting for a show Hermione...and so am I. _**

**Well that's too bad because you're not getting one, this isn't going to be as bad as you say it will be. I _will _have a happy ending. And nothing you say will change that. **

**_Lovely just lovely, not only are we about to enter our own personal hell mouth, but my once deemed sane alter ego has lost it. Fan-fucking-tastic. _**

"We're here..."

The cab driver called out, he got out of his car and emptied the trunk out. They had only decided to carry the most important items with them, Thorn had already shipped the others to Hogwarts the night before.

Thorn was the first to step out of the cab, and the other three followed.

Hermione took inhaled, breathing in the fresh air with a happy smile. Thorn and Ronny stood behind her, half-expecting some green monster to crawl out of her ears.

Thorn payed the Cab driver, and picked up his LV bag, slinging it over his shoulder he looked back at his ward making sure she was still present.

They merged into the crowd with ease, the strange group molding into the muggles trying to take in as much of their home as they could, hoping they would never forget.

Hermione walked on with confidence and beauty.

She would no longer be afraid.

_**The battle begins. **_

**Authors Note: **The next chapter should be out next week, it all depends on my school work and such. I'm sorry I took so long to update, I had finished the chapter and all but I never uploaded it I suppose.

I'm sorry for such an abrupt ending, but the next chapter is expected to be a excruciatingly long one, so I promise to make up for it.

Thank you for being patient.

Please review and no flames.

Griffen.


	10. Chapter Eight

**Authors Note: **Oh my days! I know, I know it's been ages, years in fact but I've finally decided to write this again. For those who are new to this PLEASE don't take it too seriously this is my personal fluff, my little bit of crazy anime you know? I was watching this Japanese show called "Hana Kimi" and I died laughing through out the series and it reminded me so much of the fuckery I wrote in here that I just had to update again.

So enjoy and remember, this ish is just for laughs.

Thank you for your time.

Griffen

* * *

"Linn?"

Thorn clutched onto her arm in obvious trepidation as they stood in front of the entrance to Platform 9 and ¾. Trey and Ronny were staring at her with slack jaws as they tried to comprehend what she had just said.

"Just walk through it"

She repeated with a huff. Trey shook himself out of his stupor and stepped infront of her with his hands on his hips.

"I'm been in this train station more times than Thorn has had sex"

Thorn giggled quite shamefully at the thought but he continued.

"And I have never seen anyone walk into a this bloody column, just how in the dark are us muggles huh? What exactly have you wizarding folk been hiding from us?"

She sighed in annoyance and looked at him square in the eye, he stiffened at this not really ready to face crazy Hermione just yet, he had forgotten who he was speaking to it seemed.

".. OR WE'LL MISS OUR BLOODY TRAIN!"

She screeched. Thorn had already abandoned her side and had latched onto to Ronnys the moment she raised her voice, and Trey now stood in front of her quite sheepishly trying to ignore the laughing gazes of the rude Londoners that passed them by.

"Alright, alright don't get your knickers in a twist"

"Bet you she's not wearing any" Thorn snickered into Ronny's ear and they both shared a forbidden moment of joviality that was quickly destroyed by Hermione's thunderous gaze.

"Walk through it, we got it"

Thorn jumped out from behind his shelter and flicked his long dark hair over his shoulder and repositioned his LV messenger over his shoulder. He cocked his hips to the side and begun to sway towards the column, without a word to the rest of them he dived and promptly disappeared from sight.

Ronny sighed in exasperation and followed muttering.

"Always the fucking fairy"

Trey looked from Hermione to Ronny's disappearing form, shrugged and jumped into the wall without a moments hesitation, leaving Linn alone with herself. She stared at the wall with a small smile as all the memories of the past school years came rushing by her.

_It's going to be so different. _

_**Are you sure you're ready for this?**_

_What I'm sure of doesn't matter, I don't have any more time to ask questions, if I want to be happy this is the right path. _

_**Fine.**_

It sounded upset, almost disappointed, but she was grateful it didn't put up more of a fight. A spilt personality was not something she warned to add on to the list of things that ailed her. She stepped through the portal with an even wider smile and took a large breathe in the change of air.

She could practically feel the magic crackling around her and eagerly grabbed Thorns hand and boarded the empty train. Finding a compartment was almost no trouble at all seeing as though, they were sure to be the only ones riding the train to Hogwarts this evening. As she sat next to her new guardian she couldn't help but giggle at his apparent nervousness, Thorn was a star wherever he shone and always seemed to be full of unnatural magic but going into a situation where the was a large amount of ACTUAL magic somewhat intimidated him.

He looked back down to his newest charge and a small wave of pride overcame him, she was taking this so well.

"I can't believe you conned me into this"

His smile quickly turned into a scowl and he snarled at the blonde sitting across from him.

"Can you not keep that lesbian trap shut for more than 5 fucking minutes Ronny?!"

Ronny only glowered in response and turned her attention back to the now moving landscape beside them.

Trey looking quite smug offered.

"I don't think you can call her a lesbian anymore"

Thorn raised a delicately trimmed eyebrow and retorted.

"Oh? You had a sex change?"

"Why you fucking-"

"Excuse me"

All 4 heads whipped to the now open compartment door and stared at the intruder. Hermione's eyes widened considerably when she recognized the dark hair and billowing cloak and the ever presumptuous and pompous air that belonged to the one and only Severus Snape. He looked down on them all in obvious disdain and Hermione's eyes widened even more when she felt Thorn stiffen beside her.

"What the fuck are you looking at?"

Thorn shot out instantly. Snape almost fell at being attacked so promptly but quickly composed himself.

"I was told to introduce myself to my new colleagues, but seeing as they are not here I shall take my leave"

Hermione shut her eyes in fear. This was not good; this was not good at all.

Contrary to his words Snape still stood in the threshold of the compartment entrance a smug smile on his oily face. Thorn snarled and turned his head as if he was dismissing him. Ronny stood up and made her way to the door.

"Then fucking leave you oily git"

And with that she slammed the door shut, never minding the fact that she had closed it on his hand and Snape still remained howling on the other side. Hermione looked to her fallen Professor back to her friends as newfound fear injected itself into her system. Ronny sat back down without a word and busied herself with her loves hair, running her small hands through it casually as they bantered back and forth.

"BOMBARDA"

The compartment door was blown to bits and as the debris covered them completely Hermione could barely make out the shaking silhouette of her potions professor holding his wand quite threateningly in their direction.

"MY HAIIIIIR!!!"

Thorn screeched. Hermione quietly whipped out a wand and ushered a spell to clear the smoke. Thorn now stood, he was only a few inches taller than Severus himself but he was a menacing figure nonetheless. His once long and beautifully straight hair was now entangled with bits of wood and dirt from Snape's panic attack. And his crystal blue eyes held such hatred they all knew to keep their mouths shut.

Hermione's eyes darted from Snape's to Thorns, her dainty mouth shaped into a perfect "o".

_Oh shit…_

Snape took a step forward, his swollen hand pointing a menacing wand in Thorns face.

_He must not know he's a muggle…double shit…_

"I am the Potions Master at the school you have been employed at and you will treat me with respect!"

"Bitch what the fuck is this in my face?"

Snape looked thoroughly confused for a moment and seemed to question his actions and this moment of hesitation was all it took. Thorn looked from the twig in his face to the hook nosed bastard sneering at him so unattractively and without a second thought snatched the wand, slapped Snape to the ground and snapped it into to two.

"You were fucking saying?"

Trey looked to Hermione with a questioning gaze and asked.

"Don't you think we should step in?"

She nodded but made no move to get in the angry Queens way, she liked all her limbs were they where she decided. Trey nodded and seemed to understand her sentiments. No one wanted to fuck with the angry Thorn right now.

Snape was now cradling his bleeding nose and staring at the two pieces of his wand in Thorns hands in shock.

Thorn threw the pieces down in disgust, rummaged through his bag and pulled out a small compact mirror. He flicked it open and shrieked at the reflections.

"This is only gonna get worse Linn"

Ronny whispered, nudged safely behind Trey. Hermione nodded and jumped to Thorns side now baring her own wand in an attempt to appease his anger.

"I can fix it, don't worry"

He was whimpering now, his eyes never left his reflection, his beautiful hair, it would take hours to get all this mess out. He didn't notice Hermione waving her wand quite feverishly in his direction but only saw his bushy main lengthen and straighten itself out as the debri all but disappeared.

He cooed and flirted at his reflection and all seemed right again. Ronny, Trey and Linn all blanched at this, for someone so formidable he was certainly an easy person to tame. Hermione then turned to her fallen professor not quite sure what to do or say.

She couldn't help gleaning some small amount of pleasure from seeing the ass so wonderfully incapacitated. He was muttering to himself in anger, his entire body was shaking. Hermione took a step back from the fallen man when out of the corner of her eye she saw his dark mark, an angry death eater was the last thing she needed right now.

Thorn stood his ground and flipped his hair as he knelt so he would be eye level with him, smiled and said.

"You know you wouldn't be so bad if you washed every once in a while, I'd even give you a go myself if you cut your hair off. Sorry about the stick, my name is Thorn and I'm the new Muggle Studies Professor at your school"

He cocked his head to the side and reached out his soft hand towards Severus. Severus looked up at him mouth agape and stared into the crystal blue eyes in complete confusion.

Their audience remained just as silent and sweat began to form on Hermione's forehead at the scene in front of her.

Snape stood up in an instant and seemed to collect himself as he straightened out his robes and shook his mane of hair. He nodded towards Thorn but made no move to shake the mans hand.

"Probably afraid he'll catch some gay"

Ronny whispered behind her.

"Severus Snape"

Severus clasped his hands together on the small of his back and tried to not to falter in his gaze at the man in front of him. Thorn's eyes traveled from the tip of his head to the very bottom of his feet with a coy smile on his beautiful face.

"Nice to me you Sevster"

Hermione choked on air at the nickname and began to cough rather violently behind them, Trey began to smack her back and Ronny just doubled over in laughter at her plight.

Severus Snape was blushing severely at this point. His wand at been broken, he had been accosted by a muggle and was very uncomfortable with the man in front of him. This was not his day.

Thorn took a step closer and their noses almost touched.

"You know…"

He whispered, shockingly blue eyes never leaving the black ones, his long fingers grasped a lock of Snape's black hair and he continued.

"If you let me sort this mop out you'd could be quite the looker"

His lips were to his ear now. The air around the potions master seems to have evaporated and he was struggling for breath.

"That honker and all"

And that was when he passed out.

Thorn looked to the crumpled man at his feet and back to his traveling companions with a smile, then sashayed his way back to his seat fluffed his hair and proudly declared.

"Gets 'em every time!"

No one made any attempt to inquire as to the welfare of the fallen soldier and instead continued on as if he had never even appeared.

"Anything from the trolley dears?"

They peered at the small woman carting a trolley now rolled on top of Hogwarts reigning Potions Master and the three muggles stood up in obvious excitement.

Hermione remained seated and tried not to die at the scene in front of her.

_It's definitely going to be an interesting year._

_

* * *

_

"LIIIIIINNNNNNN"

Thorn was lounging in the middle of the black lake on an inflatable muggle bed, floating quite lazily over the dark waters. He wore a shameless leopard print speedo with a matching bow tie and was drinking some sort of colorful concoction. Trey and Ronny ran along the beach side with water guns attempted to win whatever war they had waged with one another and Hermione lay on her back on the beach with an open book to shield her face from the bright sun.

"What?"

She shouted back.

"Nooooothing, just making sure you're still there"

She rolled her eyes at his words and continued to read her book. Students would not be arriving for another 3 days so she was enjoying what little peace she could with her new family before it was all muddled up.

She glanced up at the Queen with a bemused air. Seeing him so ridiculously carefree in a lake that housed all kinds of gruesome monsters was a sight indeed. Trey threw himself down on the blanket beside her in obvious agony hands raised in submission towards the cackling blonde spraying him mercilessly with lake water

"I give, I give"

He whined and she ran off in the opposite direction towards the lounging she-man.

"RONNY WHAT THE-"

All of sudden Thorn body disappeared but soon popped back up with a screech. Ronny stood less than 2 feet from him, the obvious culprit in his upheaval and was laughing like a true maniac.

"Maybe I should tell them about the giant octopus…"

Hermione murmured as she witnessed the water fight that would obviously awaken the beast. Trey looked at her with wide eyes, then an evil smile contorted his otherwise innocent features.

"Naaaaaaah, he has enough fairy dust to right that wrong"

She laughed at this turned back to him and replied.

"Thorn has enough fairy dust to right ANY wrong"

They laughed at each other for a moment, and Hermione couldn't help but savor the moment, her eyes drifted back to the castle and she began to wonder just how differently this year would be with her team in tow.

She could finally be herself, independent of the responsibility that came with being the brain of the Golden Trio.

She could just be Linn Granger.

She could just be a simple teenage girl.

"OH MY GOD! SOMETHING'S GOT MY LEG, OH MY GOD IT'S A TENTACLE! HELP I'VE BEEN THROWN INTO SOME SICK ANIME PORN! I DON'T HAVE ENOUGH HOLES FOR THIS SCENARIO! NOOOOOO!!!!"

Okay, so not really that simple.

"LIIIIINNNNNNNNNN!!!"

But a teenage girl nonetheless.

* * *

**Authors Note: **Hahahaha, my favorite has to be the idea of someone on an inflatable bed smoking a cigar on the black lake. God I love Thorn. Again, don't take this too seriously, you want the serious? I beg go read Via Dolorosa.

Thanks for your time.


End file.
